I hate being alone:
I believe this is a common trait.
But I also believe I've found a good reason
to justify my hate.
You see, when by myself,
there are too many things for me to think.
When left alone inside my head,
I dwell on everything.
Too many questions fill my head.
Too many ideas fill that space.
Too many theories tear me down.
Too many thoughts in that one little place.
I try to distract myself,
but there is no distraction I can find.
Pointless arts and busy hands
do not equal a focused mind.
When I'm left with just myself,
I acknowledge that alone, I stand.
But if left that way for a time too long,
I start to realize just how alone I really am.
I have no one to share with;
no one that cares.
I have no one to laugh with,
because nobody's there.
No longer does one know me
as well as I know myself.
No longer do I have one to turn to
when I desperately need their help.
And it's only my own fault;
I've pushed them all away.
But I wish that just one
would've cared enough to stay.
Left to face the world alone.
Forced to fight my own battles.
How long can I handle this?
How long before I unravel?
I watched one by one
as they all walked away from me.
And now here I stand:
A soldier without an army.
Points:
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Canary word: Present
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129,704 Literary Works • 671,510 Reviews
this an awesome poem it reminded me of myself hope you know you aren't the only one like you i'm exactly the same i think it could have rythmed a little more but you know you can't have it all you did pretty good i'd say and think you could find a way to make friends it's hard i know but you can do it.
Wow....just amazing. It shows the struggles that people face in life. I have known people that have trying to push everyone away, but, I didn't stay gone long because, I know what it is like no have no one. This shows what it is like inside of our head. People think we want them gone, when we just want them to show that they care enough to stay, when we are trying to push them away. This shows what I feel like when I try to push people away, out of fear that they will hurt me. Just amazing work!
Sorry it sucks, only the forth review...still trying to figure it out.
Hey there.
), I couldn't find any errors at all. It flows really well, the rhyme is just brilliant and the emotions diffusing smoothly. You've managed to do the job of expressing how a lonely person feel, very well, something I've never quite managed (NOT due to the lack of effort or attempt).
Once again you amaze me with how well you write. I could really connect to this piece too. People have different ways of dealing with a crisis. While some deal with it by surrounding themselves by more people and becoming more of a 'people person', some deal with it by this word called 'isolation'. If this poem is based on your personal experience (which I have a gut feeling it is, and in case it's not, forgive me), then you're obviously the second variety. And that's what I did too.
Coming back to reviewing your poem (as you can see, I tend to get distracted very easily, silly me
Once again, Amazing Job!
Harshita
Hello Rachel! I read your poem and re-read it. And then I read it again, hoping to find some flaws that I could be all critical about and write my review. But I found your work to be flawless; it flows very well and the content is so good. Many readers (myself included) would feel totally connected with your work; people would even go on to think that it is their own life story. And the rhyming is so great;I certainly need to learn that from you. I can say with confidence that no poetry-lover would ever dislike this.
I would love to read more from you!
Hi Rachel, I love your poem to the fullest! There is not a single part of this poem that I could see fit to change for the better, as it is already an amazing, beautiful work of art. I would tell you what part worked best for me, but the entire poem was truly my favorite part. Your rhyming scheme is truly wonderful, the formatting is surely a factor in my love of your poem. The words flow extremely well, one into the next, none of it feeling forced at any time. I would read this every day, I actually might to be honest, because as I reread it, over and over, trying to find a flaw to help improve it someway, I just fall in love with it all the more. I don't think I have read something that has allowed me to feel so truly connected with it, as if you wrote the poem about how I feel, and that is an amazing task you have accomplished. If I were to pick a favorite part, it would have to be;
"And it's only my own fault;
I've pushed them all away.
But I wish that just one
would've cared enough to stay."
Because I relate to this more than anything. You are an amazing writer Rachel, don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise, and never stop!
Thank you so much; I'm glad you liked it!