A.N: This is a poem about drugs! :D I didn't feel that this work needed to be rated, because it's not encouraging LSD, but quite the opposite, anyway... If you think I should rate this, let me know! Otherwise, consider yourself warned. Also it's for school...
Say not what they said,
Say not what they told you,
What they told you would happen.
“You forget it once it's gone,
You forget the terror,
The terror that never ends.”
When they say it's beauty,
When they say it's a journey,
Is the journey a lie?
“Colours are melodies,
Melodies are colours,
Take the trip.”
If someone had told you,
Said the trip could be bad,
Would you ever have left?
"After taking the acid, I imagined that we had driven head-on into an eighteen-wheeler and were killed. I could hear the screeching metal, then a dark and evil quiet. I was terrified at this point, I actually thought we were dead....For a year I wouldn’t go into any cemetery because I was terrified I would find my own grave.” —Jenny
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Hello Tuesday here for a review.
I like to begin that I enjoyed the quote you put at the bottom and how it could relate to this poem. I have a friend who does (or did) drugs and this poem could describe how she felt in a sense. Also enjoyed the beat of this poem, like the italic as the thoughts and soon afterwards the voice answering it or something.
My favorite line or stanza in this poem would be “You forget it once it's gone,
You forget the terror,
The terror that never ends.” because it has a message. I liked this line also because it shows the reader or the person who is used in this poem that they don't wanna do the drug once again but have the memories of doing it in their mind.
The thought throughout this poem is that people are telling you that doing drugs is good and all, to where you try it. The memories of trying it, are embedded into your brain and there is no way to get it out of your mind. My friend, as I said before, did drugs and soon after had asked me to do so but I didn't do it however. She died two weeks later from an drug poisoning (is that a thing?)
Anyway, to end on a good note, I enjoyed this poem and hopefully get to review more of your work today during Review Day.
Farewell,
Tuesday
Thanks Tues~
Generally it's called a 'drug overdose'. I'm so sorry about your friend <3
Hello fellow sock! I'm here to offer my review, haha. You've packed quite a bit into this rather brief poem. I especially like the title, with it's double meaning there (I myself use titles a lot to add to my works, haha). And as some have mentioned before, it's a nice change of pace from the usual happy-fanciful take on trip drugs.
It also hints at an interesting commentary about how people view the drugs. You have a narrator who had a really terrible experience with a trip, but everyone says it's supposed to be really good. It makes you wonder if everyone isn't just fronting, and they all had a really bad time, but they don't want to let on. And that's why people keep going on, because nobody wants to admit that it's bad. Either because they don't want to look weak, or they're trying to convince themselves. Whatever way it manifests, it throws an interesting question out there.
Formatting-wise, the lines split into groups of three quite nicely. Each triad has its own self-contained part of the whole message, which is good. And the quote at the end adds a touch of realism to it, makes the reader feel like there's a real person on the other end of this experience. I like it!
I don't really have any specific improvements to mention, it's all really stylistic choices, and I like what you've done here. Good work sock-friend! I look forward to reading more of your work in the future, hopefully ^_^
- HIGHWHITESOCKS
Thanks fellow sock! ^_^
I love it! This would sound really cool with some really cool beats. =)
You think? O.O I might just try that...
First off, just let me say that you did a fabulous job. It flowed smoothly, there weren't any distracting errors, and I was pleasantly surprised that I was being discouraged from taking the drugs, hah.
A lot of stories/poems I read/hear about LSD seem to typically funny and light-hearted despite it actually being harmful to take, and the quote especially made this incredibly refreshing. Keep up the good work!
Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
When I first saw the title of this I though of LSD dream emulator, and the drew me into reading this. I find this really interesting I really like how you describe how its like to be on LSD. And also I think that quote at the end will encourage people to not take LSD or any type of drug, well, hopefully. No nitpicks for me, really like this poem. (Btw, you just earned a follower :3)
Thanks!
Hello there...!
Okay firstly, I really don't see any reason for this to be rated. Like you said, it is actually DISCOURAGING drugs, so all's good.
I absolutely loved this. I think you've worded this really well. It is beautiful, in a twisted sort of way. I could not really find any fault with this one. I adore this. I think you've got a gift for writing.
Looking forward to more works.
Cheers
Wow, thank you.