Young Writers Society

A/N: Based off of the song "Tainted Love" popularized by Soft Cell.  Link to the original video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UNaTwf63uqw WARNING: this is not technically inappropriate, but it does involved a guyliner-ed Caesar singing to a little girl, so it is disturbing. It could ruin this awesome 80's jam for you forever. 

Also, I did find parodies with a similar premise on Youtube, but I believe mine is different enough to qualify as "not plagiarized". 

I just found out there’s horsemeat
in my beef, yeah it’s not
Really beef  
It’s been found in meat all over the EU  
Now everyone’s
losing their lunch  
And Romania’s
Getting blamed for doing this to us

(chorus)
Once I ate beef rare (I ate)
Now I cannot bear
This tainted meat I’ve gotten
So I’ll just let it go rotten  
Took my cash and spent it on horse
Oh...tainted meat (neigh neigh)
Tainted meat  

Now I know so I must
throw it out I've got to
Get it out
It just doesn’t feel right
To eat ponies
On buns with cheese
They say that it’s perfectly safe  
But they can’t hide horse DNA  

(chorus)
Once I ate beef rare (I ate)
Now I cannot bear
This tainted meat I’ve gotten
So I’ll just let it go rotten  
Took my cash and spent it on horse
Oh...tainted meat (neigh neigh)
Tainted meat  

Don't touch it please
Don’t wanna grill Black Beauty
I love beef but this hurts me so
Now I'm going to eat chicken wings, oh!  
Tainted meat, tainted meat (x2)
Don’t eat it baby, tainted meat (x2)
Tainted meat(x3)