I’m held here. Detained. Locked behind the violet evening
sky.
You could never comprehend how I can sketch metal lines to fly so high,
But my eyes are glazed past the bars; I’m blind to nought but my own health
So I question my complaints; yet I shouldn’t resent the satanic factor of wealth.
My life is suspended by the frayed knot in the noose,
By the minuscule thread of string and the hairs on the back of my neck.
This cell implores me to let go, to halt the fight. To lose.
I can’t do that. I’m not the runt of the pack, nor a nervous wreck.
Every morning, I see myself tumble to Earth in a pool of blood, but I refuse to die.
Every day, I force myself to let go of your hand and say my last goodbye.
Every night, I set myself adrift in a comatose dream of you.
Every lie to myself is that ‘I’ll see her soon.’
This cell has no mitochondria, it has no chloroplasts.
It has no sense of freedom, and happiness never lasts.
There is no cell wall, no membrane, just bars.
Bars of lies between you and me. Yet all I can see is your scars.
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140,537 Literary Works • 673,408 Reviews
Hello Weymouth and happy review day!!
I really like this. It says a lot.
But, some of the rhymes seem a little forced.....
But, I seriously loved the way you described every part if your confinement. I actually found it a little amusing that you compared the holding cell to an actual cell in the body. Well, amusing in a dark manner because this isn't a very happy, merry, cheery type of poem lyrical thing.
Anyway, I saw no grammatical or spelling errors so perfect job!!
This is truly a masterpiece! This is just magnificent!!
Keep writing!!,
~Tiff
This poem is amazing. I agree with everyone else. This is a suspenseful poem. I believe referencing a difficult time in this person's life to a cell, is very creative. There are no pointers I can give you at the moment, so I will end this review by saying:
Well done! I hope you continue posting pieces of your work on here!
Beautiful, Weymouth, this poem is astoundingly beautiful, and I can get what you mean when you say it was too personal to enter in that competition. Sometimes when you write something so eloquent, personal, and beautiful, like this, giving it alway is almost like giving a part of yourself away! None the less, if you entered it and I were the judge, it would have won.
I wouldn't change this in any way! It is absolutely beautiful. If I had to choose, I would have to say that the 3rd stanza is the one I like the best, but all are equally magnificent 
Keep writing, you certainly have wells of talent and not using it would be a crime!
-Zanda
Wow. I loved this! There is such an amazing feeling of anticipation in this poem, you're waiting for something to happen everything is hanging on by the ''minuscule thread of string'' you created that feeling so well. Writing about being on the edge of something, Whatever it is, I find to be quite difficult you mustn't go over that edge the skill of being able to linger on it is an acquired one. Beautiful metaphorical language here, I'm sure everyone can relate to this poem by applying the meaning of the ''Cell'' to something in their own lives, something powerful and restricting. Really loved it. Great Job!
~ Booshian