notice how his eyes go from green to gold in the summer shade to the winter light
take in the small moments where you can't help but look over and smile at him
hold his hand strong and tight letting his thumb trace up and down your pointer finger
map out the freckles covering his nose and lay your lips to each and everyone of them
remember that his favorite color is cherry red and that he hates when people touch his hair
listen to all his stories, even if they're long, because they will always have a happy ending
watch the way his entire face crinkles up when he laughs
and how when he gets excited that his voice gets high pitched
try and forget the fights about the small things
and learn from the ones about the big things like getting rides and feeling alone
remember that he always means well
and would never hurt you in a million years
love him hard and with all your heart
and I promise you he'll love you ten times more than that
love him better than I ever did
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Canary word: Present
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125,034 Literary Works • 672,915 Reviews
So one thing you should probably fix, is the commas. There are a lot of commas missing. Along with, in poetry, you are suppose to end every sentence with a period, and start every sentence with a capital letter. Other than that, I believe you did very well. I really hope to read more from you. And also, I strongly encourage you to write a book. About a boy and a girl in love, or something of that sort. You seem to be a very creative person when it comes to romantic things. I really do encourage you to do that. I hope you do take my advice. Like I said before, I really do believe in you. I know you can write an amazing book. Along with many short stories. Please keep writing. This was very cute, and I loved it. PM me if you'd like to write a book together! I'd really enjoy writing with you!
Have a great day!
~Ash Perdew
P.S.
I Strongly believe in you @TinyJarStoredDreams
You've got more potential in writing than you think.
I'm not good at reviewing poetry so I'm going to just leave this as a comment. I loved this but at the same time it hit very close to home and made me think of someone annnnd now I'm all emotional which I normally don't get from reading things so A+ job, I think. I'm going to go find some ice cream...
I don't like this.
Hi, here with a review. First of all, I really like how you've decribed this boy. I could really imagine this boy tht you've described beautifully. I like the tittle, it made me want to read and it grabbed my attenion. Overall, I really enjoyed it and loved it and keep writing.
ok this is pretty good!
it is the best, and it is pretty corny but that is just fin 
it is good to have a love story be a little corny, case that is what everyone expects 
the beginning was just a little bit rushed but that is just fin 
it is pretty good once agene the end was perfect! the "love him better then I ever did" I really liked that! but one of the most corny parts in the holl thing would be "would never hurt u in a million years" but every one likes love story's to be a bit corny, so from a one to 10 I would put your little story at a 8 witch is pretty good! I like to way u put every thing, but maybe work on it not being as corny, but keep up the good work 