i used to write so many poems
about love and nature and wanderlust
the poems kept coming
--an unending river
of lines and stanzas and drops of lone words
i couldn't be wrung dry
-
but now
where have all the poems gone?
i've forgotten how to pour myself onto the paper
--maybe i've just learned to hide myself too well
but i wish to learn again
to know how to poem once more
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
138,707 Literary Works • 672,250 Reviews
The irony of this poem is that you've just written a really good poem! It really like it. good work. I don't really have any complaints, maybe it could be a little longer? But I like it being short. It ends nicely, and I hope you learn how to poem again!
As always, keep writing, and happy new years!
Hello! I am B.
I want to start off my saying that this was very unique, I have not read anything about this. I just got a little confused though, with all of the "--"s in there. Are the meaningful? Did you need them there. I just want to state some short stuff, and say that my favorite line what where you actually talked about how to set it up. "of lines and stanzas and drops of lone words
i couldn't be wrung dry
-
but now
where have all the poems gone?"
So, Why did you have just two words in one line? I would not have done that, but it just depends on if you want to or not.
OVERALL: I loved this so much! Just keep writing.
~B.
Though it's a subject that's certainly been done before, I'll always enjoy a good "poem about a poem" - in fact I have a whole section in my portfolio dedicated to such poems!
Well let's get to the review!
Interpretation
So, I interpret this poem to be about a speaker who is feeling like they've lost their poetic voice. They used to be filled with ideas and they feel like those ideas have all lost them.
Intriguingly at the end of the poem. they surmise that maybe it's that they've just learned to hide the part of themselves that was always pouring poetry, and that they'll have to re-learn to poet again (or in other words, they'll have to re-discover their self in order to write again). That's a neat thought.
And along the way of the poem - you paint these really elegant metaphors of pouring/water as words that shows the reader that the speaker has not lost the ability to write poetry, but maybe just have lost the ability to summon it at will or to recognize it. Really interesting stuff BlueCat, and I like most that this poem goes beyond just "I have writer's block" - which eh we've allll written those poems before, but it actually goes into "what does it mean to lose your poetic voice" and what really is poetry, if it's not just pretty metaphors? That's some deep stuff. And dances around thoughts that have really ate at my soul too.
Thoughts about Interpretation
On one hand, I want to suggest polishing a few parts in the formatting and flow of the poem, on the other hand I wonder if the lack of polish is intentional or actually adds to the meaning/experience of the poem. Because if it was completely polished that'd contradict the message in a way.
That being said, if you do want to give the poem a bit more polish I have a few thoughts, but feel free to leave them, if you want the poem to remain a bit more raw and an unpolished to go with the intended meaning.
1. Take a second look at punctuation marks. I'm okay with a lack of punctuation, but it's gotta be consistent then. Putting in the dashes and the question mark for me looks even more distracting because there aren't any other punctuation marks else-where in the poem. And double-dashes -- at --- the ----- beggining of lines, really break lines up, because the reader doesn't know how to interpret them without jumping backwards to the line above, so it's like putting a question mark in the line after it's supposed to go.
^ there I tried to demonstrate what I'm saying about dashes, they're hard to interpret in a line following where the break up a clause. They're effective for purposeful pauses, but are distracting in all other ways.
2. I think another polish thing, is that it is cute to say, "I want to poem" - but of course grammatically it doesn't quite work, and may be misunderstood by some.
Opportunity for Expansion
I think the most compelling part about the poem, where it goes from a poem about writer's block, to a poem about poetry, is in those last three lines, I'd love if you could expand on those thoughts. In fact, if not in this poem, that could be incredibly fruitful material to expand on in another piece.
Personal Note
I thought I'd leave a few personal comments as well poet-to-poet!
How to Poet
First, I think it's important to remember that the "Oh my gosh, I've ran out of poetry" feeling, happens to everyone! I know it's happened to me quite a bit in the last year, where it just feels like I've lost my poetic touch, or that everything I read is loads better than my material. Here's what helps me, that might or might not help you.
1) To write good poetry, you have to read good poetry
Don't stop reading! (And not just YWS stuff! because that can put you in a bubble too) When I feel like my poetry isn't at the top of my game anymore, the last thing I want to do is read other people's poetry, because it makes me feel super incompetent, but man it is so important. Reading new poetry helps you continue to stretch your poetry muscles even when you're not writing. And will hopefully get you motivated to get back to the paper yourself. I recommend reading a blend of older (maybe even Shakespeare!) then some modern stuff that stretches your poetic mind too (e.e. cummings, Tracy K Smith, Kei Miller...) search and explore - lots of good poets out there! Lots of talented folks on this site even.
2) Get outside your comfort zone
Sometimes the reason it feels like we lose are poetry, is because it's all started to sound the same. That happened to me so often pre-napo, during napo, post napo... uh now... XD What I do is try to write what I "think" all my poems are about. Then I try to write a poem that doesn't use any of it! If you're using one type of imagery or theme as a crutch, write a couple poems without! It'll feel uncomfortable, and unnatural, but keep practicing and soon you'll be able to incorporate your old style right back into it with a fresh new lens.
and finally...
2) Get back into your comfort zone!
Seems contradictory given the last advice? No, they actually go well together!
I hope some of that helps! Though, I am continuing to go through that stage myself, so I know how it can feel. And if ya ever want to rant poetry or write a poem together, remember you can always PM me poetry bud! <333
Much love and well wishes to you!
~alliyah
thank you a million times <33 c:
You're welcome!
Oh, lemme tell ya, happens often that we poets run out of muse. And it's in these taxing times as poets that we actually learn a thing or two about ourselves - who are we as writers? What do we aspire to become as writers?
I'm reviewing this work more as a poet and less as a critic. It's short and the form is simple, so there's more value in reviewing its meaning. It seems less a piece of literature and more a sort of call for resurrection of your literary muse. I'll try to relate, maybe add something I know about these troubles.
I've always been a lyrical poet rather than an epic one. Stories are fine and dandy, and nothing beats a novel in verse (I'm looking at you, Eugene Onegin), but I found that lyrical poetry is better for an aspiring writer. It's quicker, bears less weight, and can be written with just about any topic in mind.
That's why I think you'd benefit from something like that. Heartbreak, emotional pain and love are very strong and heavy topics (unfortunately, they are also done to death by modern poets). But there's only so many times you can write about the same thing whilst keeping it unique and different.
I don't think you've run out of inspiration, and I definitely don't think you can lose your ability to poem, I just think a poet must broaden their horizon and write about even the simple, weightless things in life.
An example would be when I sat in maths class (failing, no reason to study anymore), dazed out and boggled by the woe of combinatorics and probability, and wrote a quick, two-stanza poem in a rhyme scheme and meter I made up on the spot. What was it about, you may ask?
Well, quite simply, about the dread of maths class, and how I'd rather sit under an oak tree and write.
To no one's surprise, it wasn't very good. But it's better to write something new and learn in the process than to weigh oneself down with the same topics again and again. That just leads to burning out.
I have to say that experimenting with form is quite revitalizing as well.
In closing, try writing in the 'Onegin Stanza,' about the sun setting over a river. There's a new, albeit not very original topic, with the added challenge of sticking to a strict form.
Don't lose your grip on writing, my friend. It's such a great skill, it'd be a shame not to nurture it, now that you've come so far as to actually start writing!
Hey there! I like this, mainly because i can totally relate. I really like the simplicity of the work and the way you used the metaphors to add to your point of the poem. However, i don't understand why there are dashes scattered through out the poem. I like the fact that none of the letter are capitalized it adds to the characteristics of the poem. Over all great job! Keep it up. The words and thoughts will come back eventually!
So long for now
~Hanna