The Gloom
Dwindle deep within this gloom of sea,
Your celestial realm hindered by yesterday,
Beneath lost faith and onto yearned glee.
A shackled wanderer onto be set free.
After salvation, diverging to enter the fray.
Dwindle deep within this gloom of sea.
And this sad struggle. This feeble fearful flee
Sinks you lower with every gasp, onto your way
Beneath lost faith and onto yearned glee.
Give in! For acceptance is a saviour for thee
To reel your mind, to tether what has gone astray.
Dwindle deep within this gloom of sea.
Oh quivering light! Shine upon my dying plea,
Aid thy lost soul, thosefaded howls blown away
Beneath lost faith and onto yearned glee.
Bare your flame high, none can foresee
Rage, love, death, failure, all is coated grey.
Dwindle deep within this gloom of sea,
Beneath lost faith and onto yearned glee.
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,801 Reviews
Hi, Turtles514 here and I am going to be a reviewer today. I love the way your poem rhymes with extrodinary vocabulary and a touch of gothic which I like. I'm not the most gothic person you could find that is for sure but I clicked on the horror category and found your poem which was very well written, I enjoyed it. Also to me the character seems to be committing suicide or death in some way to relieve pain. Again beautiful poem loved it, don't change a thing.
Hello, I’m Sandman and, I’ll be your Reviewer toady.
First of all, I love this poem. It is a very well written poem. It is a good poem about losing faith and giving in. At least that’s what I think that It’s about. It makes me feel what the character is feeling. The description you use is very… good. It helps me realize that this is gothic. Which I like gothic things (being a Goth naturally I would be attracted to this poem). With this poem, I feel that it is steering the readers directly into the darker things in life. It is not a bad thing because the world could always use some more thing that takes you to the darker things in life. This work makes me feel like the character is very damaged mentally and emotionally.
It is a very big thing that you’ve done with this poem. I love it. I love how it takes you to the darker place and it makes you try to feel something that scares a lot of people. It is exactly the thing that makes most “Normal people” think that we are “Weird”. I hope you have a really great Review Day and, that you continue writing stuff like this work. It was a pleasure to read your word.