Glimmer Of Hope.

Sitting there; head in hands,

She is drowning in her own tears.

What she thought was good,

Became one of her worst fears.

*

Thinking over the sequence of events,

She basically cries her heart out.

After hours and hours of sobbing,

She hardly gets what exactly she is crying about.

*

So many issues in her life,

A new problem to deal with everyday.

Obviously crying does her no good,

Life doesn't seem to be okay.

*

Friends try to help her,

But she finds trusting hard.

As one tries to approach her,

She quickly puts up her guard.

*

What she thinks about is,

What have I done wrong?

Her memory throws back many answers,

She doesn't have the courage to be strong.

*

She grows so fed up with everything,

She doesn't even want to live,

What she seems to forget is,

Hope is something everything around us can give.

*

She looks out at the trees,

How they seem not to mind the wind and rain.

Some even stand through thunderstorms,

She realizes she has been crying in vain.

*

Next she looks at insects,

Something so many humans seem to kill.

Standing through all difficulties,

They don't lose all the hope and will.

*

Looking out the window,

She sees a homeless boy.

He looks tired and weary,

But his smile seemed to spread joy.

*

With only three examples she learns her lesson,

She lives life as she should.

Overcomes all her problems and depression,

Sees life as an optimistic person would.

*

She helps others in need,

Stays strong so nothing can break her.

Learns that problems are only hurdles in the way,

And that a smile takes a person quite far.

Comments & reviews · 3
Attention: You have a saved draft of a comment to this work. Click here to load it.
Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

User avatar
Hope19
Comment

This is so cool. I loved it. It made me want to read more after each line. You need add some commas and quotation marks. You did good though!

User avatar
Snazzy
Review
Snazzy wrote a review · Tue Feb 24, 2015 3:23 pm

Hello! :)
This is wonderful! :D Very well written! I only have one little nitpick...

"What she thinks about it,
What have I done wrong?"

I think maybe the second line should be italicized, since it is her thoughts. Other than that, I thought this was really good! I especially like the ending-

"And that a smile takes a person quite far."

Great job on this! I look forward to reading more poems from you in the future! :D
~Snazzy :)
Stay Awesome :D

User avatar
ghazal
Review
ghazal wrote a review · Tue Feb 24, 2015 11:58 am

i found this poem very well structured and it was just going smoothly in a flow.
This seemed so like me lol. i would not say it was perfect piece of writing but yes with the minor changes in her poetry like i found there was a rhyming missing in her last stanza she could have come up with aan appropriate wording to give the best conclusion.



Most people ignore most poetry because most poetry ignores most people.
— Adrian Mitchell