Atop the exquisite emerald hill,
through the ornate ocean of orchids,
past the alluring azure river,
inside the impressive, intricate castle,
lay the mystical mirror,
displayed on the stone wall.
~
A young girl stood,
skin as white as snow,
lips as red as blood,
hair as black as night,
staring longingly in the mirror.
~
She wished relentlessly for her mother,
as she envisioned her by her side.
Her mother’s pale fingers gently stroked her hair,
brushing and braiding it as she hummed a sweet melody,
her cheeks rosy and heart warm.
~
Tears dripped down her face,
as she slipped back to reality.
She never had the chance
to meet her mother,
to know her,
but still, she knew,
deep down, that she loved her.
~
A mysterious masked face
appeared in the mirror,
and the girl chanted the curse
she knew all too well.
“Mirror mirror on the wall,
who’s the fairest of them all”.
~
The face cackled and grinned.
“My princess,
you are the fairest of them all”,
but she was desperate for another answer
for she was frightened
of the queen’s vicious vanity
and her ruthless response.
~
Tears blurred her vision,
fear clouded her judgment,
as she ran,
inside the claustrophobic castle,
past the river of regrets,
through the ostentatious orchids,
atop the excessive emerald hill,
and into the forboding forest.
~
She looked up at the dimming sky,
praying to her mother
to guide her,
to help her,
to be with her,
when she needed her the most.
~
But then she dropped her gaze,
embarrassed for believing in spirits.
She felt disheartened and lonely,
but still, she ran,
and soon she no longer ran alone.
~
A pale dove fluttered by,
as if sent from the heavens,
and led her through the trees,
while chirping a sweet melody.
~
She glanced up,
as the darkness revealed the stars,
and whispered “thank you”,
as she disappeared into the night.
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139,825 Literary Works • 672,772 Reviews
I love this poem. Your descriptions are very beautiful, like i'm staring enraptured at a field of beautiful gems while i'm reading. I feel for poor Snow White...
I love your description of the forest, the river, the castle.
"Atop the exquisite emerald hill,
through the ornate ocean of orchids,
past the alluring azure river,
inside the impressive, intricate castle,
lay the mystical mirror,
displayed on the stone wall"
It's a little heartbreaking how she wishes for a mother only to be stuck with the evil stepmother of nightmares. This reminds me to be more thankful i have a loving mother who does not send hunters after me.
The chanted curse is a warning for Snow White to escape the clutches of her evil stepmother, i don't think she takes pride in being the fairest of them all, unlike the evil queen who would lord it over everyone else. I like how the scenery sort of changes after the mirror answers her. How everything becomes darker, like the forboading forest, the claustrophobic castle the ostentatious orchids. Snow White doesn't seem silly to me for wishing for her mother, even though she chastisises herself. The silver doe that guides her was a nice touch, it kind of reminded me of Harry Potter, but that's because i'm a proud fanatic.
I love this poem. Your descriptions are very beautiful, like i'm staring enraptured at a field of beautiful gems while i'm reading. I feel for poor Snow White...
I love your description of the forest, the river, the castle.
"Atop the exquisite emerald hill,
through the ornate ocean of orchids,
past the alluring azure river,
inside the impressive, intricate castle,
lay the mystical mirror,
displayed on the stone wall"
It's a little heartbreaking how she wishes for a mother only to be stuck with the evil stepmother of nightmares. This reminds me to be more thankful i have a loving mother who does not send hunters after me.
The chanted curse is a warning for Snow White to escape the clutches of her evil stepmother, i don't think she takes pride in being the fairest of them all, unlike the evil queen who would lord it over everyone else. I like how the scenery sort of changes after the mirror answers her. How everything becomes darker, like the forboading forest, the claustrophobic castle the ostentatious orchids. Snow White doesn't seem silly to me for wishing for her mother, even though she chastisises herself. The silver doe that guides her was a nice touch, it kind of reminded me of Harry Potter, but that's because i'm a proud fanatic.
I love this poem. Your descriptions are very beautiful, like i'm staring enraptured at a field of beautiful gems while i'm reading. I feel for poor Snow White...
I love your description of the forest, the river, the castle.
"Atop the exquisite emerald hill,
through the ornate ocean of orchids,
past the alluring azure river,
inside the impressive, intricate castle,
lay the mystical mirror,
displayed on the stone wall"
It's a little heartbreaking how she wishes for a mother only to be stuck with the evil stepmother of nightmares. This reminds me to be more thankful i have a loving mother who does not send hunters after me.
The chanted curse is a warning for Snow White to escape the clutches of her evil stepmother, i don't think she takes pride in being the fairest of them all, unlike the evil queen who would lord it over everyone else. I like how the scenery sort of changes after the mirror answers her. How everything becomes darker, like the forboading forest, the claustrophobic castle the ostentatious orchids. Snow White doesn't seem silly to me for wishing for her mother, even though she chastisises herself. The silver doe that guides her was a nice touch, it kind of reminded me of Harry Potter, but that's because i'm a proud fanatic.
Thanks for the review!
Hi Quinee...
I think that ur poem was great !
I have never came across such beautiful poem . I think that though the poem was nice
but at some places it became dull. but its fine.
Ur way of describing the pretty girl was fabulous .
I am a little younger than u but still I could understand the poem.
I would try to adopt ur skills and hope i would also be able to write something like that !
keep writing !
from Sulagna
Thanks for the review!
Wow! great!
For me, versification will always be unattainable. An even number of syllables, the same emphasis on paired syllables - all this mathematics will never give soul to a poem.
You did it!
Excerpt:
"A young girl stood,
skin as white as snow,
lips as red as blood,
hair as black as night,
staring longingly in the mirror".
like a spell
Wow! Continue and improve!
Thanks for the review!
Hey!
Wow! This is such a wonderful take on the story of Snow White. Such a different, yet tasteful, look on her story. The way you describe things bring me into her world, a magical yet dim world. I love the wording used throughout, it really adds to your poem. Really, really great job!
I see no mistakes or anything to change. It's just quite a perfect poem, and I'm happy you shared it.
Can't wait to read more of your work!
From your friend,
@PlainandSimple
Thanks for the review!