Tomorrow hides our life.
Our plans.
Our love.
Ourselves.
Tomorrow is a day full of hope.
Tomorrow the sun will open its eyes and watch us smile.
Tomorrow the wind will guide us towards an open door.
Tomorrow we will laugh about yesterday with our innocent eyes.
We never know what we get tomorrow.
But we always know that there will be a tomorrow.
Whether we fill it with worry, excitement, tradition, prayer,
It will always be waiting for us
waiting for the sun to close its eyes
and say goodnight to our overwhelmed bodies.
It will always be waiting for
the wind to tell it when to close yesterday's door.
If you couldn't fall in love with today, don't despair, there will always be
Tomorrow.
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140,961 Literary Works • 673,784 Reviews
Wow. This is just an amazing piece of writing, it actually really cheered me up
I love the repetition of the word Tomorrow and how you have contrasted Today and Tomorrow in the last lines. Another thing i like is in the beginning, where you split up that one line into four, although i think it would have more effect and emphasis if you used a full stop at the end of each small line instead of a comma. Just personal preference but think about it
One last thing, the fifth line from the end is a little too long i think, maybe consider shortening it just a tiny bit? I think it jogs the rhythm a little, you could always split it into two after the word 'eyes'.
All in all, a wonderfully written and structured poem. Keep it up!
Thank you for your this review! I took your suggestions and added them to my poem. I'm really glad that these words that flow out of my head can change your mood for the better.
@JasperCollins, I agree with everything you've said about this poem.
@Percybeth, what an amazing poem!!! I love this one even better than your last one! I loved the whole tomorrow and yesterday thing. "If you don't fall in love with today, don't despair, there will always be Tomorrow." That last line was my favorite! Keep up the good work
~Savvy
Thank you, Savvy! <3
You're welcome! <3
I really enjoy the mystery you associate with tomorrow, as it truly is everything you described it as. Your use of anaphora is beautiful, and I love the positive tone about it. The personification of everything it great. I honestly cannot find anything wrong with this poem, and I look forward to seeing more from you!
Thank you so much, this means a lot to me.