Young Writers Society

I like it. It's dark and mysterious. If you would let me, I'm going to dissect this poem, just so I can get a better understanding of what's going on.

1st Stanza: You're going crazy and nobody is helping you with whatever problems you have.

2nd Stanza: You get transported into some dark place. You used to be afraid, but you're not anymore because you're "used to it".

3rd Stanza: "They" are your nightmares. They're helping you through the dark place. Probably because it's a link to the real world.

4th Stanza: Can I call one line a stanza? Oh well... You think dark thoughts.

5th (or 4th) Stanza: You love your nightmares, because they're the things that helped you through troubled times. They, in turn, love you.

The last line: You're home.

I love this poem so much.

Hello,

I loved this poem, because I could see what was happening, and I love seeing into a persons (Character or real life) head. This really captured me from the beginning, and had me wondering what was going to happen, and what this was all really about.

"Falling,

Into this midnight abyss.

It's cold but,

I'm use to this chill.

My body welcomes the claws that reach up,

Wrapping around me."

I really enjoyed that line because it was so...creative, and something I've never seen before, well, not used in this sense, anyway.

The ending was perfect. The way you ended it really fit with this sort of thing.

Great work

I love this poem. Very well written and I LOVED how you ended it.

Hello!

BrilliantMustaches here...

I like this poem and just a few things that I think if you changed it will be even more beautiful.

My body welcomes the claws that reach

Up and wrap around me

Heyy Percybeth! <3

I remember when we read "Will Grayson, Will Grayson" by John Green, in the play at the end, when Tiny Cooper was doing that scene with the swing set, he said that love was all about the falling and everything, and then he said how it ends with the landing (when he jumped off of the ceiling). And then Will (2) was thinking about how he was wrong and it wasn't about the falling, it was about the landing, or something (but then again he had a depression problem. I don't remember most of all of this so just bear with me.). And then I was thinking about how when you said that you didn't have anyone to help you from falling (but then again love can't conquer anything ["Everyday"], so maybe it isn't about love at all), and then how you said that rivers were tears closer to the end (leading to the landing, which might of been where you found that this person was dragging you down and you sort of resigned from them, and sometimes love CAN make you lose your grip on the world. So maybe. That's just what it reminded me of. My stream of consciousness when I read this.

The only suggestion is maybe to un-italicize (sorry for the term) "landed". I like it alone, and maybe change the "I have" to "I've". Just for the song reference, it reminded me of "Landed" by Ben Folds.

Please get back to me!

-Savvy