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proposed promises you won't deliver

by LadyBug



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110 Reviews

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Reviews: 110

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Fri May 31, 2024 6:01 am
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alpacaboss says...



these are the kinds of poems that make you read it the second, third, fourth, and fifth time, because even if there's less than 10 lines, there seems to be so much to unpack. so let's dive into it.

my lover woke me up, a bloody nose


From the start we get a shocking opening. the way I would interpret this is that the narrator has a bloody nose and is the yearning soul. one would usually get a bloody nose if they have tendency for it, is sick, or if they are beaten up. In this case, I think the last one is most likely. She woke up with a punch to her face and a bloody nose. I may be taking this too far though.

a yearning soul. I would have been a good mother


I think these two fit quite well. She's yearning for a child thinking that she would be a good mother. But perhaps her circumstances or medical conditions are prevent her from achieving this dream.

i have only your blood on my ring finger, proposed promises you wont deliver


Now this is interesting. I interpret this as they are contractually bound to be lovers by marriage. Yet the oaths and promises the lover gave at the altar were not delivered. This could imply that the partner did not consummate the marriage or even worse, committed adultery

I love you like there's no bible


the Bible is often thought of to contain the list of rules and commandments a Christian should follow. I believe the Bible as absolute truth. when the narrator says this, they're expressing how their love will transcend all sorts of rules indicating there may be some malice or obsession in the love felt for the other party.

Overall, well done! This complex poem can be interpreted in numerous ways, and you stimulated such thought in less than 10 lines. Bravo


Signing off,
alpacaboss




User avatar
110 Reviews

Points: 10575
Reviews: 110

Donate
Fri May 31, 2024 6:01 am
alpacaboss wrote a review...



these are the kinds of poems that make you read it the second, third, fourth, and fifth time, because even if there's less than 10 lines, there seems to be so much to unpack. so let's dive into it.

my lover woke me up, a bloody nose


From the start we get a shocking opening. the way I would interpret this is that the narrator has a bloody nose and is the yearning soul. one would usually get a bloody nose if they have tendency for it, is sick, or if they are beaten up. In this case, I think the last one is most likely. She woke up with a punch to her face and a bloody nose. I may be taking this too far though.

a yearning soul. I would have been a good mother


I think these two fit quite well. She's yearning for a child thinking that she would be a good mother. But perhaps her circumstances or medical conditions are prevent her from achieving this dream.

i have only your blood on my ring finger, proposed promises you wont deliver


Now this is interesting. I interpret this as they are contractually bound to be lovers by marriage. Yet the oaths and promises the lover gave at the altar were not delivered. This could imply that the partner did not consummate the marriage or even worse, committed adultery

I love you like there's no bible


the Bible is often thought of to contain the list of rules and commandments a Christian should follow. I believe the Bible as absolute truth. when the narrator says this, they're expressing how their love will transcend all sorts of rules indicating there may be some malice or obsession in the love felt for the other party.

Overall, well done! This complex poem can be interpreted in numerous ways, and you stimulated such thought in less than 10 lines. Bravo


Signing off,
alpacaboss




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Fri May 17, 2024 11:51 pm
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EllieMae wrote a review...



Hey friend! Ellie here with a quick review. I have always loved your poetry and I was happy to see that you posted five poems yesterday. I am excited to read these and interpret them.

my lover woke me up, a bloody nose
a yearning soul.


I love this as a first sentence. It makes me feel like all of your poetry is a series telling a story of how your life has been. And we start right at the beginning, waking up. Being woken up with a bloody nose is a bold statement. Does this mean that you were "woken up" (perhaps coming to a sudden drastic realization or development in personal beliefs) by your lover (a person you loved/loved you/you care(d) for).

i would have been a good mother


I guess where there is no life, part of what could have been still exists, through our words. I love your poetry and I am grateful for the life I experience through your words.

I only have your blood on my ring finger, proposed
promises you won't deliver.


I love the formatting of this. Might I suggest you paste a text version of your poems below the visual, or in the comments. That makes it was easier for reviewers to copy and paste for reviews :D

But I love this section of the poem. The visual of blood being the replacement of where a ring could have been. What promises could have been. What love could have lived. I see so many what ifs in this poem. So much reflection on so much yearning. Pain but so much growth.

I adore this ending line:

I love you like there's no bible


How clever is that! Absolutely beautiful. It makes me think of undeniable love. "no matter what" type of love. "id love you if I could love anyone else" type of love.

What a lovely poem! I am looking forward to reading and hopefully reviewing the rest of your poems. Thanks for sharing your talents and beautiful reflections on YWS.

Take care! Your friend,
-Ellie




LadyBug says...


thank you so much for reviewing my work! i absolutely love your interpretations



EllieMae says...


I%u2019m glad you find them helpful! Looking forward to reviewing the other 4 you posted soon :D



LadyBug says...


i can't wait to read your reviews <3




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