Deafen ears

Hello, fallenoutofgrace, Tay01 here with another review. I am from the Blue Moon (or the blue team you can call it).

First. The only thing you need to work on is your spelling. There are many spelling errors and mistakes which need to be corrected.

1. Nothung: Did you mean nothing? Because I'm afraid that the word 'nothung' is wrong. Even my computer autocorrects it to 'nothing'

2. reconize: Did you mean recognise? There is no such thing as reconize. Either recognise (British) or recognize (American)

3. kelidescope: Did you mean kaleidoscope? Yes, another spelling error.

That's spelling covered. Now to past tense and present tense. This is real really really important.

1 (a) I cannot hear as you try to speak but I read your hands,
1 (b) I could not hear as you tried to speak, but I read your hands,

2 (a) My eyes hungering with the knowledge,
2 (b) My eyes hungered with the knowledge,

3 (a) And I try to speak "love you mom"
3 (b) And I tried to speak "love you mom"

There. Keep looking for more. Now, punctuation.

1. And I try to speak "love you mom"
@ There is suppose to be a comma before "love you mom". A full stop at the end, and the L is capitalised.
# And I try to speak, "Love you mom."

Lastly, grammar. This is also important.

1. I may hear not the glorious rush of the cars whizzing by,
@ There is the word 'past' between the word 'whizzing' and the word 'by'.
# I may hear not the glorious rush of the cars whizzing past by,

That's it for now. There are many more mistakes, I just took a few or one example, you will have to correct the rest by yourself, and find more mistakes by yourself. I cannot do all for you, or you will never learn. WILL NEVER LEARN!!!

Thank you, Happy January Review Day,

~~review from,

Tay01, Blue Moon (Blue Team)

Hi! Nightshade here to review. I only have a few cons so im just going to start with those if that's okay.

I disagree with the person below, these grammar errors they just seem like typos to me but what do I know. Also, I don't think you need the as in the line

"As I look around my soundless world,"

I think it be better if you just scratch the as off.

Now I love this poem and I find this really well written and a cool topic. Your a great writer.

I liked how you described and used imagery when explaining everything. It was like the reader was reading someone's story instead of a poem.

Hello Fallenoutofgrace,
Myjaspercat here for your review

I loved this poem, I think that it is very well written and some of the best poetry I have read in a while. However there are a few things I would like to suggest.

1.)If I am not mistaking on the second line you spelled the 'nothing' wrong. (Unless you did it on purpose for emphasis, but I don't think you did.) Don't worry it is just a small grammatical error.

2.) "I come to reconize are intended fates,"
---Two things here, 1. You spelled "recognize" wrong and 2 what are the 'intended fates'. It doesn't flow well with the other lines before it. Is not being able to hear the 'intended fates'?

3.) "The vibrant colors of this beautiful realm,
Where colors are a kelidescope of colors amoung its dwellers,"
---Again a few things, 1. You spelled 'Kaleidoscope' and 'among' wrong. 2. You repeated the word 'colors' 3 times in the last two lines which is way to repetitive. Please and try not to do this again.

4.) Line 18 (I think I may be off by 1-2) 'Mourning' means to mourn someone's death, instead it should be spelled 'morning' to follow the rest of the line.

5.) "Sucking dry our innocence with every syaball you richochette upon us"
---Two words are spelled wrong, 'syllable' and 'ricochet'

Ok, like I said in the beginning I really like this. I do want to add a few things though to my overall felling. You have way to many grammatical errors. I don't know if it's because you didn't read over your work but it would be nice if you could at least spell check. By doing so it makes it easier on the eyes and lets your reader flow through the poem better.

Anyways, Good Luck & Continue Writing.---Myjaspercat