fort
go forth and build me a fort,
command thy fort.
forth i go to build thyne fort,
for fort.
solid timber to prepare for winters,
and avoid them splinters.
as i build thyne fort,
for fort.
i’ll use splashes of pink,
and paint red roses, i think.
as i finish that fort,
for fort.
it’ll be such a sight,
alright, alright, alright.
then i blow up that fort,
for sport.
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Canary word: Present
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138,751 Literary Works • 672,279 Reviews
Wow, this actually made me laugh! Simple, but amusing. I like what you did with it. I found no errors at all. Sometimes we work so hard for what we destroy, and somehow, that's funny!
Good job!!
~ musicandme
Dear Birkhoff (hekhek), I'm here for a review (ain;t that obvious? kyahaa)
You got here a nice poem. Well, yeah sort of nice at first ( to fort), but then you've gone "turbo' against him. Why? I had fun reading this poem though. To spend time making a poem for someone. It is really touching and fun to read. Is this one really for fort? and did he really ask you to build him a fort? Is that fort this poem? (kyahaa! maybe not)
The way you describe the fort that you are about to create was so awesome and vivid that I felt myself being able to watch the building of it. It also created an atmosphere of fun in me. I just don't know why, but I really enjoyed reading this.
The thought that you're just going to blow the fort you've created in the end, made me laugh (LOL!)
Great poem, Keep it up!
lol, looks like you just kinda gave up on the last sentence of the second to last stanza XD
O.O
IT'S PERFECT.
oh, hi Fortis.
WTF. Not while she's in it right?
I'm not sure how I like that plot twist at the end...
o.o;
It's halloween tho...
O.o
hahaha so true XD
For some bizarre reason, this reminds me of the Latin word 'fortis' which means brave (wow, my Latin teacher must be proud of me for remembering that) and how forts are, for me, a symbol of bravery.
I don't really have any criticism for this piece because, in my mind, it's well-written and well thought out. Well done
Hmm... reminds me of that too.
@fortis run for your life
This is quite the memorable poem; it brings back memories of when I used to build forts at home. I like how you have used the repetition of the word fort as it leaves an impact on the reader and it emphasises the point that you are trying to get across. I like how in some parts you used old language which creates a feeling of role play and fun. Congrats on keeping a steady rhyme scheme that flowed throughout and having the right words for the poem as it is quite difficult. I love how at the end you say that you will blow up the fort as it signals the end of it, which matches how he poem is ending
Well, thats all from me,
Godly