The C.I.D. team was sitting in the C.I.D. beauro discussing on the case. A.C.P. Cannizaro received a phone call.
" Yes, Dr. Ozonolysis... Oh, just stop being suspenseful.... Tell me what happened? Ohho! Okay, okay we are coming. Wait. " said Cannizaro.
" Sir, what happend? " asked Volhard.
" As usual. Ozonolysis wants to tell us something and he says that he won't tell us if we don't reach there soon. He has started to act pricey too much these days. ", said Cannizaro with playful anger.
Cannizaro and Ozonolysis were good friends. So such playful angery splits would often burst between them.
The team reached Dr. Ozonolysis's forensic lab. His helper was a young lady, named Rosenmund, nicknamed Rose. She was indeed as sweet as rose.
" Goodmorning, Miss Rose! " greeted Hell excitedly.
Zelinsky coughed deliberately. " Hell, it is afternoon..." He said. " Control your feelings, Hell. " whispered Zelinsky in a teasing tone.
" A-a-a.. Good AFTERNOON, Miss Rose! " he first looked angrily at Zelinsky and then smiled at Rose.
" If your goodmorning-goodafternoon is over, then can we start with the talk for which we were called so hurriedly over here? "
" Y-y-yes Sir! " said Hell, keeping a control on himself.
" Boss, see this. " Ozonolysis took Cannizaro and others towards a digital instrument which had a big screen.
" What nonsense, Ozonolysis! You brought us here to show this new instrument?! Shame on you! " said Cannizaro.
" Will you let me on it? "
" Okay, now you want to show us how it functions? Stop acting, you goofy. We were discussing on an important topic and you called us here just to show us that you have brought a new instrument?!!"
" Okay, then. Let it be. I'll not tell you anything. " said Ozonolysis angrily, as he turned away and folded his hands.
" Ozonolysis, tell us quickly. Stop being snobbish now. " said Cannizaro.
The team convinced Ozonolysis and he agreed.
He plugged in and started the device. He showed an image on the screen.
" Boss, this is the image of the face of the body which you brought to me. I and Rose worked hard on it and finally were able to make that horribly marred face into an image on this computer. It is not much good though." Ozonolysis explained very slowly.
" Miss Rose, a--and Dr. Ozonolysis, thank you very much for helping us. " said Hell.
" Give us a copy of this image. We will ask the neighbours and Zanjeer if they know this man. " said Volhard.
" Bye, Miss Rose a-an-and Dr. Ozonolysis. " said Hell.
The team left with the image.
They first went in The Fraunhoffer Fashion House. They saw Zanjeer there.
" Do you know this man? " asked Zelinsky.
To know the reply read more...
End of chapter
Continue to next chapter The Terrible Youth of Freznel: 22Points:
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140,793 Literary Works • 673,688 Reviews
Eros, I envy your storytelling style. How I wish I could write like this!
It aroused my interest and made me curious. You're good!
Having said that, the idioms you use make me feel that you're thinking in some other language and translating into English. I'd surely try to improve on that.
For instance 'stop keeping the suspense' isn't an English-thinker's idiom. It would probably be 'Oh, stop being suspenseful!' or 'stop being secretive!'. Similarly, 'don't eat price' would probably be 'stop being snobbish!' or 'stop playing pricey!'.
The quick fix to this is to start speaking English, so you eventually start thinking in English too!
Keep at it! You have the raw-material to be a good English detective novel writer.
Oh! Thank you soo much shekshen! You are correct that I think in other languaga & then translte it to English. Thank you so much!! I have fixed that. Thank you so much! xD
I am full of curiousity here! Tell me what is going to happen soon because if you do not, the feelings will kill me soon! Anywas, this part was really interesting and breathtaking. As always you release fast as a flash! I do not know if this is bad or good, maybe a bit from the both at once. Overall, I like this part because the deeper analyzation of the horrible recent murdering.
I am interested in who it may be as I said earlier for the previous part but now the interest is a bit more. The little crush Hell has for Miss Rose is just adorable. I hope there is something between them in the end. Now, to the small edits.
'talk' can be used only if we say 'to' who is this person talking to. So, if you do not want to add to who he is talking, then replace 'talked' with 'said'. 'Said' can be used alone by itself.
I think you need a comma before 'nicknamed' you make a sudden turn there.
'that was nicknames Rose' sounds good, also.
'Good morning' are two seperated words.
Keep on writing and good job with this part as well.
Thanx a loot!! XD
Welcome again.