If I Had Wings

Hello!
I like how your last line didn't rhyme. It's perfectly okay, and it sounds good with this poem! I only have one little nitpick-

"I would see all things,
and me they would see."

For some reason, this sounds wrong to me, but then again, it may just be me... I don't know what you could do though to make it sound better... So I would just keep it as is.
Other than that, I couldn't find anything to correct! Wonderful job, and keep writing!
~Snazzy

I loved this poem. It truly shows how anyone would feel about having wings, including me.
The ending is a great way to end the poem. I feel as if this poem, while short, still shows how you feel about having wings.

Overall nice

Hello! Ninjawaffles here!!

I really like the topic of your poem and your writing style is nice, too. I am here just to give a few suggestions on what you can improve in this poem.

"I would see all things,
And me they would see."

For the first line I would suggest something like "I would see everything," just because it helps get the flow going. And for the second line, "and me they would see" sounds very awkward even though I understand what you're trying to do. I would put something along the lines of "and they would see me."

"Would I be super and why?"

Even though I know you are trying to rhyme 'why' with 'fly', it sounds very awkward. So maybe change that sentence a bit.

The last two stanzas are very nice. I especially love the last one. All in all, it's a very nice poem with just minor things that "I" find a bit off. It's my opinion though so you don't have to change anything you don't want to.

Now, I just want to say that I've never had the wish to fly or have wings. This is just me personally due to my fear of heights. Yet I could still feel the connection to it, and that's what makes it so powerful. Though I can't relate, I can connect. I also like how it rhymes until the last stanza. In my eyes, writing it this way puts the emphasis on the last stanza. It sticks out, and makes it seem the main point of the poem. Which would make a lot of sense due to the poem's nature. All in all, this was a very good poem, and I am eager to see your other works.

I'm glad you explained the thing about the last rhyme. Being a rhyme Nazi, I would have critiqued it.

And me they would see.

I liked this poem a lot. There isn't really anything to correct you on, this is mostly just praise. The nice thing about poems is that you have so much freedom in your writing. The only thing that threw me off was the last stanza which you immediately had clarification after. I appreciate that, if you meant it to be that way then you have the right idea of telling people so you aren't being corrected on something you like. Anyway, really good job! Keep it up.

RoyalHighness has arrived to review!
Okay, so this was okay. There are two lines I have problems with.

"And me they would see."

I see what you're trying to do here, but I'm not sure that it's the best thing to write. Sometimes it's okay to have two lines rhyme with the same word. I'd suggest re-wording it, because it's a little difficult to read; I had to go back and make sure I knew what you were trying to say.

"Would I be super and why?"

Why what? Am I missing something? I feel like you just wrote "why," to make the line rhyme, and that's never a good idea. Don't substitute good writing for rhyming.

"To wings, who could say no!?"

This is the same idea as the first line I commented on. I see what you're trying to do, but its wording makes it difficult to read at first. Also, the combination of the exclamation point and the question mark is really distracting. Pick one!

Overall, I'm sorry to say, I didn't love it. I'd give it six stars of ten. But I'm just one person, and I'm a very picky person. I wouldn't take it personally, since a lot of other people seem to really like your poem! I just thought I'd let you know what I thought.
I /do/ like the last stanza. I could totally see two people flying away together. It was really sweet!
I really like the stanza about the voices. I thought the rhyming was really clever, and I can really relate (my voice sounds like a man). Good job! Keep writing! Don't let one not-so-great review get you down. You're still a fabulous writer.

Agh! This makes me wish I myself could have wings (and I do want them )

Great job! I didn't see any spelling errors or grammatical errors.

And yes everythin rhymed (except for the last line, which I know was not supposed to)!!

Love this poem—I wish it could actually happen! If we all had wings that would be amazing.

~ WillowPaw1

PS this was a very short review .

The rhyming is great! It would be nice to have the last part rhyme, but the poem was so good, why bother? I really do think it is fantastic.

In the future, (if you do make anymore poems) you don't always need them to rhyme, of course. If you want your poems in the future to be more exciting or longer, I think that would be great! You don't have to, though you might get good reviews and ratings.

For your rating, I would say about 10 out of 10! This poem was excellent! Make sure to write more poems, cause I think they're great.

Keep up the good work,

Sunset101

Nice job, Em101cats! this is just as good as your other poem 'A Light In A Sea Of Darkness'!!!
heres my review:

Spelling: wonderful!
Grammer: perfect! I also liked how u made the last stanza not rhyme. it brings up the affect!
Rhyming: all but the last stanza, but I liked how u did that, like I said in 'grammer'.
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars and 10 out of 10!

Like I said before, good work!

Keep doing what your doing!
~puppys3117~