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a sunlit night

by Elinor


For far too long I have lived my life in darkness.

I’ve waded my way through clouded, gray days

and long black nights. the stars and the glint of the moon

has its own sort of beauty, that’s true. Of late, I’ve come to

see these particular canvases for what they are,

flecks of beauty, of hope, of a respite from my mundane existence

always out of reach.

When what I want most of all is to feel the sun,

not just for a passing moment, but forever.

It will shine on me again, they say.

In the meantime I don’t know how much more of it I can bear,

For I am so cold without its embrace.

And yet,

If I ever tire of the stars I remind myself

that there are nights where I cannot see them and I know

that their absence is always worse.

If I ever tire of the clouds

I remember the summer when I was a girl and there was no rain.

The grass grew brown and trees shriveled up

in its absence and I longed for the cool touch of the clouds

to give us some relief.

I must remind myself that I’ve felt the sun before,

not just for short bursts, false starts or teases, but truly,

deeply felt it.

The last time was probably the most most pleasant and comforting,

for it was the one times I can truly say that all felt right in the world

And I felt like I belonged somewhere and to something.

(I can count such times in my entire life on one hand)

Yet I recall that it was close to night and

I watched as light became dark in the blink of an eye.

I don’t know why life has to be this way and why the golden rays of sun

can never be long for this world.

Yet, if I felt it again, I must once more. 


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Fri May 13, 2022 4:47 pm
Coffeeboyjay wrote a review...



Hi there Elinor

1. What did i like the most in the poem Elinor is that For far too long I have lived my life in darkness.

I’ve waded my way through clouded, gray days

and long black nights. the stars and the glint of the moon

has its own sort of beauty, that’s true. Of late, I’ve come to

see these particular canvases for what they are,

flecks of beauty, of hope, of a respite from my mundane existence

always out of reach.

When what I want most of all is to feel the sun,

not just for a passing moment, but forever.

It will shine on me again, they say.

In the meantime I don’t know how much more of it I can bear,

For I am so cold without its embrace.

And yet, Elinor is was truly feeling like you can be yourself without any judgment.The sun symbolizes freedom and joy.It’s what you’ve looked forward to,waited for,desperately.It’s the thing you have longed to feel.Something you must have.Something sacred.Those are just my thoughts,anyway.I really liked reading this.

2. What do i think need to be improved Elinor is that i can say that this poem was about yourself because it say's here that you said If I ever tire of the stars I remind myself

that there are nights where I cannot see them and I know

that their absence is always worse.

If I ever tire of the clouds

I remember the summer when I was a girl and there was no rain.

The grass grew brown and trees shriveled up

in its absence and I longed for the cool touch of the clouds

to give us some relief.

I must remind myself that I’ve felt the sun before,

not just for short bursts, false starts or teases, but truly,

deeply felt it. so that's why i thought the poem was about you Elinor

Have fun writing!

Jay"




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Fri May 13, 2022 11:23 am
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littlepaige says...



beautiful work!




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Fri May 13, 2022 9:45 am
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Liminality says...



Not a review, but just wanted to say I love the rhyming in:

I’ve waded my way through clouded, gray days


The line breaks especially in the first part give me a sense of wandering, meandering, and kind of getting lost at points, with the enjambments.




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Thu May 12, 2022 10:57 pm
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vampricone6783 wrote a review...



I think this is about truly feeling like you can be yourself without any judgment.The sun symbolizes freedom and joy.It’s what you’ve looked forward to,waited for,desperately.It’s the thing you have longed to feel.Something you must have.Something sacred.Those are just my thoughts,anyway.I really liked reading this.I hope that you have a lovely and fun day and night.





You walk into this room at your own risk, because it leads to the future, not a future that will be but one that might be. This is not a new world, it is simply an extension of what began in the old one. It has patterned itself after every dictator who has ever planted the ripping imprint of a boot on the pages of history since the beginning of time. It has refinements, technological advances, and a more sophisticated approach to the destruction of human freedom. But like every one of the super states that preceded it, it has one iron rule: logic is an enemy and truth is a menace.
— Rod Serling