The Descent Chapter 11: My Father in Heaven Part 3

Full Novel Synopsis: Sequel to 'The Spiralling', itself a sequel to the Kick-Ass (2010) movie. However, this novel can be read on its own. After Big Daddy died, Mindy was driven mad, subdued by Dave, and locked away in an Institute after killing all who she deemed responsible but Dave. Will she recover? What will happen next to a New York without her nor the Motherfucker? Elements of the Kick-Ass 2 (2013) movie and comic series will be taken in.

The Descent

Chapter 11: My Father in Heaven Part 3

Back at Headquarters…

We had gathered for a roll-call of sorts. In the centre on the green couch sat the couple in blue sports jacket, and by them a guy in red with a logo of a black fly, notably without a mask, sat on the head of the couch, too light to tip it over. Beside the guy in red, a scantily-clad well-shaped girl was leaning on a desk beside a pudgy guy in dark cyan with 5-point stars on his forehead, upper arms and gloves. Doctor Gravity took his place opposite them. I was facing them, just out of their semi-circle, as if standing trial, but it felt like the opposite of that. I didn’t even feel like I was ‘outside’ in any way.

“So we tried the cops, and tried the newspapers. I even set up a… You know, a thing on the internet for people to help us find Tommy. Urm.” The husband half of Remembering Tommy introduced his origin story. He was solemn, half way from mourning, still in mourning. There was no way it could be faked. He couldn’t finish.

“But we got nothing. We never saw our son again.” The wife half of Remembering Tommy finished. In happiness or in grief, they seemed made for each other. They weren’t crying, bawling their eyes out like in some cheap TV series or movie. That was when I knew they’d been dealing with it for months, years upon years even. They’d simply run out of tears – I knew because I was nearly there. “I came up with the name ‘Remembering Tommy’ and, uh, we’ve been doing this 3 nights a week, so…” She couldn’t finish either, and the husband half took over.

“Colonel Stars and Stripes found us online.” So, the military guy was Colonel Stars and Stripes. But my mind decided to put him below as the priority. Even with my own demons to deal with, I could relate to the Remembering Tommy duo.

“That’s terrible, guys, I’m real sorry…” I consoled them, hoping that it meant something, from one guy who knew loss to a couple who lost their son. My mind flew back to Mindy, and all that remained that was Mandy. Still, I couldn’t help but to feel inferior to them in that respect – I still had Mindy with me, as much of an amnesiac as she was, as many times as I had to lie to her and keep the real her down as it was…

“I became Nightbitch after my sister was murdered and found in a dumpster.” It was Nightbitch’s turn. What she said gave me a new flavour of guilt. I’d judged her too soon, far too soon. Had I not done so, I might have approached her first rather than Doctor Gravity just as likely. ‘Holy shit’ I muttered under my breath, inaudible to the rest – fortunately for me, considering what I learnt about Colonel Stars and Stripes a little later, “Doesn’t bring her back, but at least I’m doing something positive about it.”

“Insectman?” The Colonel continued with the introductory roll-call.

“Yeah, urm. I- I’d been bullied my whole life for being gay. So now I stand up for the defenceless.” Even Insectman’s origin story was better than mine. I became Kick-Ass because I was naïve, I imagined how mine would go, “That’s why I don’t wear a mask. Too much like being back in the closet.”

“Long as your heart’s in the right place, we don’t care what you put in your mouth.” The Colonel declared, uplifting Insectman. A thought struck me at the time – the Colonel seemed familiar, his voice seemed like it was from somewhere… “Fist pump?”

“Thank you. Thank you, sir.” Insectman accepted the gesture gladly. They bumped fists across the Remembering Tommys on the green couch.

“Well, I became Battleguy after my parents were mugged and killed coming home from the opera.” For some reason, Battleguy’s origin story felt… Different from the rest. It seemed familiar at first, and then I realised why, “Did I tell you guys that sick bastard maxed out their credit cards on porno sites?” His origin story sounded remarkably like… Not to mention his voice sounded familiar.

“I just hope we get the chance to say hello to this guy someday so that I can personally levitate his soul from his body!” Doctor Gravity had unwittingly fallen for it. Apparently everyone else did before I came along. It all clicked in place while the white atom was talking.

“Oh my God, Marty?” I blurted out, surprised at how small New York City was. Battleguy spat out his coffee immediately, shocked. It’d pretty much cemented his fate. “Yeah, I knew I recognised your voice.”

“No, I don’t… I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t know any Marty.” Battleguy, or rather Marty, deepened his voice, took a seep from his mug of coffee, pointed the accusation at me, “New guy.”

“Hey, asshole, it’s me, Dave.” I said, a little pissed at his dishonesty, though a side of me told me I was no different back then, just that I didn’t have the opportunity to lie about my origin story like Marty did. I pointed at my face, trying to get him to recognise my eyes and mouth through my wetsuit mask, through the shadow casted by my helmet made it a little harder.

“Dave?” A hint of recognition in his eyes before it exploded. He looked like a kid whose world had turned inside-out, or who’d just entered the Twilight Zone, “Why are you dressed up like Kick-Ass?”

“Because… I’m Kick-Ass!” It took a while to sink in, but eventually, it did. Marty was smart enough, smarter than Todd, maybe even me. An interesting predicament, seeing him going down the same path as me. I remembered his criticisms more than a year ago, when I first conceived of the notion of becoming a real-life superhero. ‘Because it’s impossible, dipshit.’ He’d said dismissively while he was reading his comic at the Atomic Café. It seemed that I had the final laugh on the long term.

“You two know each other?” The Colonel ascertained, though it was likely rhetorical. In the meantime, Marty was hovering between being stunned and awed. Maybe with a bit of humiliation on the side.

“Yeah, like since we were 5!” I answered, laughing. What were the chances? The world didn’t feel as lonely. It was the therapy I need, “What’s all this bullshit about your parents getting killed?” I went on in my revelry – my bad, but might as well. I could see Marty desperately trying to shut me up but failing.

“Yeesh! Language.” The Colonel stated his disposition towards the way we talked. He looked badass – It caught me off-guard. He looked like a guy who wouldn’t even faze at Hit-Girl’s language, but then again, I was being superficial, “Battleguy? Care to update your resume?” He looked at Marty, a tightrope between forgiveness and vindictiveness. I could see it past his green mask.

Marty sighed in defeat. “Ah… Urr… I’m trying to figure out how to explain this without sounding like a complete idiot right now.” Marty stuttered, looking around at everyone, fear of trouble unbecoming of a superhero in his eyes. Not that he was not unbecoming of a superhero earlier. Though to be fair… Not that any of us were real superheroes. Not totally, not ever, not like Hit-Girl was. Marty was an old friend, and I’d long forgiven him – I wasn’t sure about the rest.

“Yeah, I’m not sure that’s possible, Batman.” Nightbitch said. As it turns out, I wasn’t the only one who found Marty’s origin story familiar. For a flash, Me and Nightbitch were looking eye-to-eye, it felt like a connection between us was made, mediated by Batman and the Battleguy controversy.

“I’m not, either.” Marty admitted, “Urm, okay, when I found you guys online, you were all swapping these awesome origin stories.” Borderline panic was setting in, “I mean, Colonel, you’re ex-mafia for Christ’s sake.” Then it happened, that side of Colonel Stars and Stripes happened.

“Yo.” He stared at Marty sternly, a hint of murder in his eyes. “Don’t take the lord’s name in vain.” He seemed religious. For a moment, I was reminded of Jesus. The familiar vibe to Colonel Stars and Stripes returned, that familiar, Italian vibe…

“I’m sorry.” Marty was beyond remorseful, “I just… I didn’t think you guys would let me join the team unless I had a good story too.”

“Alright,” The forgiving side of the Colonel won out, quite smoothly and easily I might add, “we’ll let you off the hook this time, Battleguy.”