dear moon..

Seems like the speaker is seeking comfort under something that has always lived in the shadows of someone superior to them. I love the way it's written somewhat like a letter to the moon, it feels very personal. I love the last stanza that says
‎"dear moon,
‎the one who can face the shadows and still shine
‎the one who can look upon the sun but never gives up
‎the one who can comfort the fallen stars
‎you will never be the sun, but he can never replace you."
‎It feels comforting, consoling. Seems like a lot of us are like the moon on this Earth
‎Overall my only critique is that your work has minor grammatical errors, something I personally struggle with a lot too (Probably have a bunch of grammatical errors in this review itself lol so don't worry)
‎Awesome work!

Hello,

First things first, wow, I love the way you formatted this poem its as if this is someone's mindset every night as they see the moon, every night different questions and observations.

I love the moon, and I never thought it was in competition, but your poem makes me think, and my favorite line of yours is: "you take the sun's yellow and change it to your own." I think that's very beautiful in a way of saying you use what you have to be what you can. I love it.

By far my favourite line out of all of there is;
"dear moon,
even though you reflect the sun
I can still find beauty in the white light
you take the sun's yellow
and change it to your own"

It shows that despite how you think of yourself, others will still see the light. The poem is well written, relatable and a new topic I haven't read about yet!

Also; "you will never be the sun, but he can never replace you." Is a line I resonate with, Im not sure why, however I adore the repetition of it all.
Simple and easy to read yet meaningfull!

This is such a beautiful poem. Sometimes I do find myself wondering, 'Does the moon ever get jealous of the sun?' Maybe it does, and maybe it doesn't. But in my opinion, and you really showed this throughout the poem, that the moon will always be equally loved just like the sun.



''will you ever be as loved as the sun?
they associate sun with beauty
you look to see him illuminating all the tranquility of daylight
while you are stuck reflecting, only a fragment of him, struggling to light up the shadows''


I feel like throughout your poem, I'm thinking of a topic similar to what you are talking about in your poem, but I just can't lay my finger on it. It has something to do with being in someone's shadow, almost like a backup dancer, a really good backup dancer, but that backup dancer is only the reflection of the celebrity. I have no idea where I am going with this, but I hope you sorta get what I'm trying to say.



''you try to talk to the travelers, try to guide them, but they don't hear a thing''



Maybe that's the reason the moon follows us every night. It's because the moon is lonely and needs friends. I can relate to the moon, and I'll try not to get mad when it starts to follow my car home!



''the one who can face the shadows and still shine
the one who can look upon the sun but never gives up
the one who can comfort the fallen stars
you will never be the sun, but he can never replace you.''


I like how this ends soo beautifully and at ease. The sun is always going to be the sun and the moon is always going to be the moon. The sun can never replace the moon, for without the moon we wouldn't be able to examine and be amazed of the beauties of the night, like the stars.

Overall, I really enjoyed your poem Cats. I love that you are continuing to write gorgeous poems and stories and I really admire that about you. Keep up the good work!

Wow! I really liked this cats, this is really well written. I really liked how you started off with a more questioning stance, with the struggles that the moon might face and ended on a more conciliatory reassuring note. An acknowledgement and a kindness and I think this was absolutely brilliant.

Oh , how I love the moon. This is a great piece of art

Hi darling!

I am dearly lucky to have stumbled upon such a lovely poem! It's truly a piece of work that is a poignant exploration of identity, using the celestial relationship between the moon and sun to mirror human feelings of inadequacy and the struggle for self-worth.

It is simply lovely how you move so beautifully from a place of envy to a realization that the moon possesses a unique, quiet power that the sun can never replicate!

Your personification of the moon as a figure that almost listens to something like the whispers of the night, or tries to talk to travelers, it really adds that layer of depth that makes it feel very personal. I almost feel somber reading this in a way for the moon from the way you use your words.

My advice for later works is to perhaps consider tightening the rhythmic pacing in the middle stanzas! Some of your lines become slightly wordy, which can soften the blow of your more visceral imagery. I would also love to see more of your celestial metaphors. You truly have a beautiful way of words, and reading this piece is like breathing in fresh air and sitting on the grass while looking at the stars.

I implore you to keep writing, and I can't wait to see what you come up with next!

Keep writing!,

Lizzy