Unknown Love

by mellophone7

Published April 21, 2011

In Poetry

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Does he know?
No.
I only saw him once,
but that glimpse started it all.
Now I long to see him
every day.

Does he know I exist?
Maybe.
I can't talk to him,though.
I blame my shyness,
but being quiet helps.
When you listen, you learn,
and now I know more about him.

Does he know me?
Maybe.
I spoke with him today,
and those first words were awkward,
but as we talked,
I grew more comfortable.

Do I tell him?
No.
I don't think that
he thinks of me that way.
I will be his friend.
That is enough.

Does she know?
No.
I am careful around her,
because she would guess what I want.
And she would tell him.

Do I want that?
I don't know.
This is hard
and frustrating.
Feeling it,
but not speaking it.

As time passes, it grows.
It changes form but remains the same.
Then, one day he speaks to me,
and I tell him of it.
He smiles
and tells me the same.

Does he know?
Yes.
I love you.

Comments & reviews · 14
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mellophone7
Comment
mellophone7 commented Comment · Apr 29, 2011

To answer EtCetera's question:
I guess I never completely thought about it. When I was writing it, I kind of thought of the entire thing from the speaker's point of view, but now when I think about it, it could be that they're both saying "I love you."

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EtCetera
Review
EtCetera wrote a review Review · Apr 29, 2011

Wow. Just pure thought and nothing else. I am impressed. I can never get my thoughts to actually end up in a nice stanza-ed format like that. I take huge amounts of planning. I have nothing to say but only a question to maybe spark conversation of the piece: Did "he" actually say "I love you" or was it all in the speaker's head?
Very good word selection and it has a nice rhythm. Keep it up!

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VousEsEtonnant
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VousEsEtonnant commented Comment · Apr 25, 2011

Aweeee! :/ *sniffle* I wish my life in love ended that well.

inimitablebeauty wrote a review Review · Apr 24, 2011

i totally relate to the lines:
"I blame my shyness,but being quiet helps.When you listen, you learn,and now I know more about him" this happens to me all the time(and to girls across the world). too shy to admit you like him, but aching for that guy. now everyone else dealing with this can know their not alone. thumbs up!

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ofir
Review
ofir wrote a review Review · Apr 24, 2011

I love this! It was so pure... I felt like I was looking at this poem, or maybe even the girl speaking, through clear and cold spring water - you painted such a clear picture! Good job! I'm very sorry this isn't much of a review. I feel very refreshened after reading this! :) Thank you!
Keep up the good work!
Ofir

harshita3chaarag wrote a review Review · Apr 24, 2011

wow!! It was so beautiful!! I loved it!! like really loved it!!! it was so full of love and emotion that i just fell for it.. I totaly understood the need for her silence.. very beautiful!! :) keep it up!!

Random avatar
Doxie00
Comment
Doxie00 commented Comment · Apr 23, 2011

Haaaa omg that sounds soooo much like me ! O.o haha loved it ! :)

TheGreatBronsteeny commented Comment · Apr 23, 2011

I love this poem. Granted, it's short and I know I've seen something along these lines before, but GREAT job either way. I think I like it so much because it's such an easy topic to relate to. Good job, keep it up. Also, no spelling errors. YAY!

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NLPrincess13
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NLPrincess13 commented Comment · Apr 22, 2011

GOOD JOB, keep up....................:D:D

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mellophone7
Comment
mellophone7 commented Comment · Apr 21, 2011

Thank you for the comments!!! :)

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Soulkana
Review
Soulkana wrote a review Review · Apr 21, 2011

This is very beautiful I want to say! ^^ Good job. I didn't see any grammar mistakes or spelling errors in this at all. The emotion in this sets a very strong mood and makes it last. The descriptions give me a very clear picture in my head. Good job I can't wait to read more of your works soon!!! May you receive many helpful reviews!!! Keep up the good works!!! Happy Writing!!!!
Soulkana<3

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MOIMOW
Review
MOIMOW wrote a review Review · Apr 21, 2011

I loved your love poem, and that's odd, 'cause I hate love, but I love oxymorons. :)
Ahh, it had a happy ending, too. That's always good. Better than a sad ending.
I wanna know what happened to the old girlfriend. I guess she's not really that important, but I'm going through this phase where I always want to know the backstory of the seemingly unimportant characters. (Like Rosaline from Romeo and Juliet. Why's she becoming a nun? Stuff like that.)
But anywho, loved it, though I hate love. :)

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MissRockers
Review
MissRockers wrote a review Review · Apr 21, 2011

Wow. I like this a lot because it really lets the reader know how difficult it is to tell a person the truth! Just the honest truth! The poem is filled with, "no's, yes's, maybes, i don't knows" and it makes the reader feel like there are a thousand things going through your head at once. I thought you didn't need to make it much longer, because we didn't need full out descriptions on what was going on in the setting, and minor details like that, just the generic idea. Good job expressing your feelings! :)



The moral of Snow White is never eat apples.
— Lemony Snicket