Young Writers Society

Hey, hope all is well. I thoroughly enjoyed this poem. The imagery you used to describe the setting is very nice. I can feel how hot the weather is. A previous review mentioned this being a setting for a football field but could this have been an archaeology site? The orange soil, the fossils in amber, the landscape and dislodging of rocks? It just makes more sense to me

However, I do agree with another reviewer on the uncertainty of the narrator. Why are they unsure? Does the cotton or bottle cap represent something? Is there supposed to be an extension of this poem into another poem to continue the story? Or was that just left over debris from previous digging and swabbing? Either way, very nice word play and good work

Hey, hope all is well. I thoroughly enjoyed this poem. The imagery you used to describe the setting is very nice. I can feel how hot the weather is. A previous review mentioned this being a setting for a football field but could this have been an archaeology site? The orange soil, the fossils in amber, the landscape and dislodging of rocks? It just makes more sense to me

However, I do agree with another reviewer on the uncertainty of the narrator. Why are they unsure? Does the cotton or bottle cap represent something? Is there supposed to be an extension of this poem into another poem to continue the story? Or was that just left over debris from previous digging and swabbing? Either way, very nice word play and good work

Hello Liminality! I hope you're having a wonderful day, so let's get on with the review!

First impressions are is that this is a very relaxing poem. It gives me a slice-of-life feel to it. You've described a football field in a simple way, but it is still effective in relaying the tone of the poem.

Imagery is very prevalent in the poem, and it describes the spectators in creative ways. I can visualize the second stanza like it's a Salvador Dali painting. The last stanza is my favorite. I did not expect it to turn into first person Pov. It's a surreal (if I'm using the term correctly) way to end the poem.

Overall, I really enjoyed reading this.


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Hello! Came to leave a quick review.

This poem is simple and captivates the audience. Let's dissect it a bit

Sitting on wet grass
bathed in sunlight,
wearing bright red T-shirts,
or yellow, or blue,
huddled under
an empty canopy,
holding on to hats
and plastic water bottles.

Maybe they melted
in that humid heat,
and became part
of the landscape,
probing the depths
of orange soil
for fossils sealed in amber.

Sometimes I kick
a rock from its spot,
dislodging it,
and as it
rolls off, I think I see
a scrap of cotton
or a bottle cap.