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139,203 Literary Works • 672,505 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Kate and I'm here to leave a quick review!!
Anyway let's get right to: Kate's Line by Line Reactions;
Well this one won't be quite as line by line as these usually tend to be because poem, but I am tempted. Almost every line in this one goes really hard but if I just repeated that on every line this won't be much of a review xD
I love the two paragraphs back to back there, echoing back and forth at each other. The initial little declaration of what makes the narrator feel trapped, of how the narrator feels being inside these walls they've made and just how far they feel from anything else. The way it leads to the whole but I've gone past this only to say maybe they're still not free of it. Its a powerful ending that really makes you think quite a bit. Especially when it comes to the way you've linked it to how its almost like their family made them this way, this was some sort of response for them to cope with what their family was like and what their family made them feel.
I think that's the strongest note I have on this. I really don't have anything to suggest, but that's just how I feel, going a little bit beyond the little explanation you had on your wall about it and what the actual words mean. Overall it just hits hard, some of those lines especially the last couple with the blood really are incredibly powerful and showcase very powerfully the way the narrator feels and how broken and lost they are in this moment. An amazing poem as always <3
Aaand that's it for this oneee!!!
As always remember to: Take what you think was helpful and forget the rest!
Kate
Thank you! <333
Hello Ley! I really hope you are not tired of me reviewing all of yours poems yet, haha! I just love poetry, especially your poetry, so the second it pops into the Green Room I get so excited. Either way, let's get into reading and reviewing this lovely work of art! Lets jump right in
Wow!!! I love this beginning so much. I find questions to be very engaging and intriguing in poetry, so starting this poem with such a big question really sets the stage for what the whole piece is going to be about. This part really speaks of being trapped. I can feel that so strongly. And you add that what you are trapped being are fake memories. You pain a picture in my head of this scene so well. Awesome job so far.
I love this. Not one personality. No words to capture the ever changing and multi faced and faceted aspects of what makes you you. You are different in so many spaces, forced to be so many people that you cannot even answer the simplest question "who are you?" Personality tests will always give different answers depending on which personality you are at that time, who you decide to be. The last sentence of 'It'll just be that answer every single time.' felt a little bit out of place/longer than the other sentences. It totally works but it almost gave a run on feel. Though I do like the directness of the statement.
I love this entire stanza. I just wanted to comment on this last line. You could almost just remove the 'of that' and still have it mean the same thing, though having it be shorter seems bolder and more powerful, in my opinion. And your following question 'but did I really?" would rhyme and create a better flow (in my opinion) without those extra words. But this is so nitpick and just what sounds better in my head, so totally up to you!
I also liked that you asked multiple questions in a row. This last part was my absolute favorite!
Your poem is organized, but represents a chaotic mind struggling to find peace, purity, and sanctuary after this escape. Seriously, I love your poetry so much and seeing more of it really helped me feel some of this peace and connection too. Your descriptions of building walls and hiding were something I felt I could really connect to.
Please keep writing and sharing poems!
Your Grey's Anatomy friend,
Ellie
Thank you, Ellie! I do love recieving your reviews <3 So please don't stop! And thank you for the recommendations
Also, I love the sign off XD