Young Writers Society

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm Kate and I'm here to leave a quick review!!

Anyway let's get right to: Kate's Line by Line Reactions;

Well this one won't be quite as line by line as these usually tend to be because poem, but I am tempted. Almost every line in this one goes really hard but if I just repeated that on every line this won't be much of a review xD

I love the two paragraphs back to back there, echoing back and forth at each other. The initial little declaration of what makes the narrator feel trapped, of how the narrator feels being inside these walls they've made and just how far they feel from anything else. The way it leads to the whole but I've gone past this only to say maybe they're still not free of it. Its a powerful ending that really makes you think quite a bit. Especially when it comes to the way you've linked it to how its almost like their family made them this way, this was some sort of response for them to cope with what their family was like and what their family made them feel.

I think that's the strongest note I have on this. I really don't have anything to suggest, but that's just how I feel, going a little bit beyond the little explanation you had on your wall about it and what the actual words mean. Overall it just hits hard, some of those lines especially the last couple with the blood really are incredibly powerful and showcase very powerfully the way the narrator feels and how broken and lost they are in this moment. An amazing poem as always <3

Aaand that's it for this oneee!!!

As always remember to: Take what you think was helpful and forget the rest!

Hello Ley! I really hope you are not tired of me reviewing all of yours poems yet, haha! I just love poetry, especially your poetry, so the second it pops into the Green Room I get so excited. Either way, let's get into reading and reviewing this lovely work of art! Lets jump right in

Can anybody hear me?
I'm trapped, beyond this wall of fake memories,
and I'm not sure if anyone can hear my cries.

Because maybe I'm a mixture of all of them,
Lost and scared but also cunning and ambitious.
So, stop asking,
It'll just be that answer every single time.

I broke free of that.

I've built these walls so high,
A fortress of forgotten faces and broken dreams,
All brought upon because I forgot how a heartbeat feels,
Because now my blood is cold and clotted
And I'm not sure if I truly am alive.