she is a time capsule of skinny vellums
corpuscular secrets atomized:
a halo of guilt, Illuminating serifed letters
shelved temporarily (on a biweekly basis)
she collects broken hearts in creased palms
semi-soggy Shreddies puzzle pieces
a kindergartner uses Elmer's glue
& it works for 18 years
she sees the substance & it is nothing but
an ethanolic stench reeking from a mind turning
a blind eye -
this is a permanent intermission.
she is a receptacle of missives:
& they fall into her lap like pennies and dimes
she wonders why each one doesn't count for more?
these punctuating missiles.
she is a time capsule of Korsakoff's memories:
a single corpus of a thousand volumes
& she reminds you: "don't forget;
start from the end."
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Canary word: Present
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141,158 Literary Works • 674,195 Reviews
Hi there! I really liked reading this!
The style in which this poem was written is pretty distinct and surrealistic, and I loved the focus on the metaphors of memory, writing, and preservation. How her role in the poem is presented as some sort of a “time capsule” is especially endearing to me as it gives the whole thing this quality of incorporating all sorts of fragments and people alongside her.
The imagery was also pretty interesting! Making the broken hearts into puzzle pieces and then comparing them to something a kindergartner would put together with glue was a lovely touch a fitting combination of fragility, mundanity, and how complex putting a person back together can be. The imagery around the letters and messages was also great
I thought the juxtaposition of it being some small, unassuming thing and simultaneously this heavy object for holding and containing feelings was really well done.
The language perhaps is my favourite part words such as “corpuscular,” “atomized,” “serifed,” or “Korsakoff’s memories” all give the feeling of a detached and academic presentation. However, I think some parts of the poem perhaps could’ve been more simplified there were moments where I had to re-read a line to understand what was going on. I think simplifying some parts and complicating others is the best way to showcase the imagery, and I think certain lines didn’t allow that.
I also liked the ending and the idea of remembering things by first recalling their endings. You get this nice circularity that thematically supports the ideas of memory and preservation beautifully. Overall, it was an extremely experimental and literary piece, and I liked the process of connecting the dots between the various metaphors and images. Good job! <3