z

Young Writers Society


12+ Violence

canada is dead

by Lavvie


A/N: Punctuation and capitalization (or lack thereof) is intentional. 


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111 Reviews


Points: 9075
Reviews: 111

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Sun Feb 23, 2020 12:31 am
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tgham99 wrote a review...



As you know, I'm always a huge fan of your works and this is most definitely no exception!

As @PlainandSimple wrote, I'm not very much into politics, but that didn't stop me from enjoying all that this piece had to offer.

I think the lack of punctuation and capitalization work very well in unison with the "choppiness" of the stanzas. We're not dealing with a lot of long lines and drawn-out sentences; we're keeping it short and sweet, which makes the message resonate a lot more intensely.

The closing lines of the poem contain a metaphor that I very much enjoyed. Creating a connection between a childhood/lighthearted game like Jenga and the morbid image of carcasses play well with one another. The dichotomy presented between these images was a strong way to pull the poem together, so I commend you for that.

My favorite line is by far "reconciliation is dead" -- these three words have the power to convey exactly how the speaker feels in regards to a country that is torn by tumult and discontent.

As I mentioned, I'm not a politics expert by far, but I loved this piece. The tone of discontent and an almost sarcastic dissatisfaction made it a great read.

Write on!! <3




Lavvie says...


Thank you for the review! Always appreciated from you, tg!



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54 Reviews


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Sun Feb 23, 2020 12:20 am
PlainandSimple wrote a review...



Hello! Here to review :).

Okay, so I am 100% not into politics, however, this caught my eye. Politics are really so much drama for me and it stresses me out. Although, I know that it's important people stand up for what they believe and what they think is wrong. That is most likely why I was drawn to this. You are stating your truth, your right. Which is so brave, because people die for that these days. (not saying that would happen, just the fact that it's a huge these days).

So why I started with me not being into politics is because I really have no idea what you are talking about. I will most likely do research of some sort after posting this. Why am I reviewing this then? (you may be asking). It's because I love the fact (as I stated above) you stated your truth and the words you used. Also how you used your words. What I mean by that is you sound so strong, so tough. And not in a bad way either. So really great job! I will be reading more of your work!

Great job!

_ From your friend,
@PlainandSimple _




Lavvie says...


Thank you for the review!




"Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
— Paul Brandt