season's greetings
she likes the sound of a piano in fall;
familiar as the taste of rain.
and though each song is printed for her,
and though the notes speak petty words,
she tells her story once, then twice
in reverberated undertones -- listless
with a broken, plastered smile.
too cold for music, she always says
when the snow first trails in supple spots.
she freezes then, with cup in hand --
dead flowers falling from her hair.
and icy is the thought of time
which grasps away her sullied pride
one sweet loss at a time.
spring arrives, and she awakens
Blossoming in sweet syrupy delight
that drips from petal-skin and clings
to hands who covet her, and cherish her.
a bud so fresh, and captured, and treasured;
her tender heart a hummingbird’s might --
when she is loved. when she is loved.
she likes the sound of a piano in fall.
a requiem for the last sip of tea,
or the last time he said she was beautiful.
and she plays her song like a martyr
wondering if he’ll ever hear her
in a world that keeps on spinning
while her tune remains the same.
and it always remains the same,
even if she wants to change.
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139,314 Literary Works • 672,529 Reviews
I loved this poem! The gentleness and simplicity in this poem just makes it beautiful
Hello Dreamwalker,
First of all, I think the lack of capitalization is fine. Poems don't always have to have capitals to be as effective but I do think that it would look just a little bit tidier if you just capitalized the first letter of each stanza. I think it would just make it look a bit more effective. The rest of it looks fine though and I think that apart from the first letter of each stanza it looks more flowing if you don't capitalize.Wow! That poem honestly blew me away! It is amazing to see such a display of beauty in just a few words, this sounded so amazing. Once I had finished reading it I couldn't help but reread it over and over again because it was simply so great! I am just surprised that someone can create something as powerful and stunning as this and I am jealous because it is the sort of poem that makes you go 'wow, I wish I wrote that'. It was honestly that beautiful and amazing. Now I have a few points which could help make your poem even more incredible than it already is!
This confused me just a tad. If it's plastered doesn't that mean that it is almost fixed? And can it be plastered and broken at the same time because something that's broken is impossible to fix isn't it? Anyway it's probably me but I just didn't understand that part.
My favorite lines would have to be and I also liked the repetition of
Overall this was really good and I liked this whole thing. Please don't take it down it is truly one of the best poems I have read and I couldn't bear to see it removed! Please keep posting your poems they are absolutely wonderful and you have a knack for making the simplest things into something beautiful. If you have any questions the please PM me and I will get back to you soon!
From DreamingForever
DON'T. TAKE. IT. DOWN.