Young Writers Society

I know you've cried 97% emotion

and 1% salt; six times in one hour and
five minutes, at 3AM, precisely .
And you're down to your last 2% of feeling
like existing.
Everyone you fear is merely 70% water.
And everyone you love is 30% stardust.



You are made of endless seas and infinite stars.
You are a constellation of hope.
Mosaics are made from broken pieces, but
they're still works of art and so are you.
this is true. sad. But honestly, what even is the real point. I have severe depression and ignore this because I am a negative person.

I loved the poem though.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love this a lot!.
Are you a mathematician? a scientist? or a statistician maybe?
You do write well.

Indeed life counts. Despite the brokenness and chaos around us.
the stars and water
I love how they work things out in your poem. The stars, the salt. Oh, how they dance gleefully in that poem of yours. Such craft, such beauty it must be known not only here in our society but even by the whole world.

YOu guys are just so a m a z i n g! So young, yet so full of brilliant ideas. I should've started writing as early as possible. But that would be of no use now. Would it?

Kudos bata! Keep writing. Keep inspiring readers and writers alike.

Wow. This is deserving of all the likes and more. If someone can't relate to this, they haven't experienced life. This is so beautiful, and I am so touched by it. Thank you for making me feel understood and hopeful. Thank you for sharing with others the hope life holds, the hope and love everyone deserves to experience. The hope everyone needs. This is a truly beautiful poem. Thank you again.

This is awesome!

" I know you've cried 97% emotion
and 1% salt; six times in one hour and
five minutes, at 3AM, precisely .
And you're down to your last 2% of feeling
like existing.
Everyone you fear is merely 70% water.
And everyone you love is 30% stardust. "

I just love it.

" You are made of endless seas and infinite stars.
You are a constellation of hope.
Mosaics are made from broken pieces, but
they're still works of art and so are you. "

I also just love it.


More more mooooreee

Hey there, ChipsMcCoy (great name, by the way). It's Mr. Powers here for another fun and exciting review. Today, I'm going to look at this poem, entitled "Life Counts".

The first stanza, while confusing to me, is also very interesting. The person you've written this for has cried so hard that he/she just might buy a farm shortly.

The second stanza is less confusing. You basically tell the person to cheer up, that not everything is gone forever.

To be honest, this is a bit psychedelic to me. Or, at least spiritual. With lines like "You are made of endless seas and infinite stars" and "everyone you love is 30% stardust", it's no wonder I feel this way. The imagery is strong here, and it leaves a soothing taste in my mouth. I like this. I want to read more of your stuff, so please, keep writing!

______POWERS OUT________

Timmy here, yet again!

I thought this one was an ingenious way to say percentages, something that usually belongs and should stay on math charts. You took those numbers and put them into a poem that was just amazing. I love how you used the words, 97% emotion. I thought that using those words, instead of 97% tears or something really added something. It said that tears aren't really a physical change to you. Its more of a mental change. A spiritual change, even. You have given up on something, or are just having a hard time believing in something. I think that using that example was just amazing and made your poem so unique, compared to all of the other poems about tears.

six times in one hour and
five minutes, at 3AM, precisely

Hi there!

Here is my honest opinion. It's filled with good intentions.

At first glance, this is good. It brings out emotion. It's swirling and intense.

I don't know if I find this work exactly fabulous yet, though.

I like your technique that uses the percentages. However, I don't know if it is as effective as everyone seems to think it is. It gets a bit list-y after a while, and while you're saying something, the way you're saying it quickly gets boring and uninteresting. Use your percentages, but don't use so many. Try spreading them out, or saying some of them differently.

The ideas are used. Overused, I would say. I have a Tumblr, and let me tell you, I see a poem about someone being an infinite sea or part of a star about twice a day. The idea is nice, but there are so many more ways to say this than telling them that they are an ocean. The image of the ocean is overused. It's big.

This poem also reminded me of this quote from Doctor Who:

All the elements in your body were forged many, many millions of years ago in the heart of a far away star that exploded and died. That explosion scattered those elements across the desolations of deep space. After so, so many millions of years these elements came together to form new stars and new planets. And on and on it went. The elements came together and burst apart forming shoes and ships and sealing wax and cabbages and kings. Until, eventually, they came together to make you. You are unique in the universe.

This is so good. I love it.
I like the whole percent thing and how you have created a really strong image.
Good job!

Hi there! It's MysteryMe! Here for a quick (rather pathetic) review!

I'm not much of a poem person, so I can't say much about improving this, but I just loved it too much not to say anything at all. So... here it is: This piece is simply too beautiful for words. You did an amazing job.

Imagery? Fantastic. Flow? Perfect. Grammar? No complaints.

My favorite part?

"Mosaics are made of broken pieces, but
they're still works of art and so are you."

Simply flawless. I can't say anything more.

I also laughed at the line: "Everyone you fear is merely 70% water. And everyone you love is 30% stardust." It's so true: both in a scientific perspective, and in the metaphorical way. This poem is just so incredibly clever and beautiful all at the same time. You have talent, honestly.

I know this wasn't too much help, but I hope I made you feel proud, at least! Keep writing!!! You're great at it!

Oh, wow. This is beautiful, the imagery is amazing. I love how you used measurements and percentages for items that aren't necessarily tangible. My favorite line, ever, it made me gasp it was so good, was

Mosaics are made from broken pieces, but
they're still works of art and so are you.

This is really, really good! I love the all the numbers spread throughout, it makes the poem feel kind of regular and brings in a storyline (kind of). I also really like the adjectives you've used, like "infinite stars" and "constellation of hope". I only have one nitpick with this, and that's line 5. I feel like it just kills the flow of the poem, try filling the line out.

I feel like i should say well done more than once, so here it is 120 times

Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!
Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done! Well Done!

Wow, very inspiring. Your imagery is fantastic, and I love your metaphors.
My favorite line was, "Mosaics are made from broken pieces, but they're still works of art and so are you." It just radiates hope. The only thing I would suggest is clarifying who "you" in the poem is. I got the feeling that it was the reader, but might not be. Great job with this! I hope you keep writing!

Edit: I just reread your description, and realized that the "you" is the hurting individual you mentioned. Sorry about that!

I like this poem. I could feel the emotion put into it. You put in a lot of percents, but you made it work. I also like how you summed it up in the end with a 100%. That was perfect. It took a while for me to understand the percents, but I got it. You are very descriptive and I liked it. Good job and keep up the great work!