a hopeless romantic, i'd call myself
but only now do i realize what it truly means
because it's so much more than my old idealizations
loving so much to the point of physical pain
my earth quakes in your presence
always waiting for your next words
you meet me in my dreams
and appear in my waking hours
even when i can't physically hold you
my fingers shake as i write
perfection is the minimum
words only limit my heart's boundaries
being seen is new territory
no longer feeling like a side character in my story
showing me i deserve so much more than that
even though you won't see this, lover
everyday i fall even harder
but it's okay because i know you'll catch me
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139,713 Literary Works • 672,661 Reviews
agaggggghhhh this is so so cute hopsy <3 <3 <3
it almost feels like a song (the last stanza at least)
Hello! I love, love, love romantic poems, books, movies. It always makes my heart flutter when a romance is done well, and this poem has made my heart flutter. It feels so whimsical as the narrator falls in love with their love interest. I love how the poem starts with the realization, and then we see the narrator crashing hard. They are physically shaking, dreaming about them, etc.
Ooh, such a great line.
It's a relatable feeling, thinking that your story doesn't matter if it's not affecting someone else.
The final stanza is the cherry on top. A sweet and romantic conclusion, implying that the narrator's feelings are being reciprocated. Lovely job!
Ohh, I love me a love poem. This one is, as far as I can tell, about the difference between idealised ideas of love and romance, and the actual reality of falling in love.
It doesn't rhyme and works with enjambments, creating a continuing narrative. I especially like that it doesn't even end in a full stop/period - it implies that the love of the lyrical I is still evolving, changing, growing stronger.
You work with lots of metaphors and antitheses. I especially like "my earth quakes in your presence"; it has a nice physicality to it. The lyrical I is literally shaking with the strength of their feelings, likening love to a natural catastrophe feels very on point. Obviously love often comes with the idea of shaking, and you pick this back up with "my fingers shake as I write"; and the earth thematic with "new territory". Instead of focusing on the "feeling" part of love, you link it to physical reactions: “physical pain”, “earth quakes”, “hold you”, “fingers shake”, “heart's boundaries”, “fall”, “catch me”. I like that, the idea a feeling so strong that it can't be contained in oneself and needs to be expressed physically.
Personally I'm not the biggest fan of no capitalisation, but it works here, giving the poem a feeling of urgency - the lyrical I had to write it down, lest the feeling overwhelm them, and couldn't spare the time for proper punctuation.
I feel it could have done with a stronger sense of rhythm, as it is, it feels a bit disjointed. I agree that it works for the idea you're going with, but, well, it's just not my taste personally.
I do like the last stanza especially, though. The direct address of the lyrical You/the lover works very well, because these are words that needed to be said, and as the lyrical I is literally shaking too much to say them, they write them instead. It gives the whole poem the feel of a secret love letter, and I think this is quite the lovely conclusion.
Overall, I really like this poem!