My empty mind is full
Of clear doubts.
I try to act naturally,
But I'm alone in the crowd.
These cold thoughts sear my mind,
As I try to focus on the blur.
My thoughts are born dead,
And divergently concur.
There is a passive aggression,
To this parallel connection.
It seems uniquely orthodox,
That life is an obvious paradox.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,855 Reviews
#FF0000 ">Zolen Poetry Check List of things that should probably be commented on, that I made so I don't forget tm
Emotion:
I feel nothing but the emotion known as emotion...and confusion.
How hard are those emotions thrown at the reader:
There are fancy words thrown!
Closing and opening premise:
I see no oxymoron! But the lines are still fun to read... over all I think it works to the intended goal but counters the title, which is actually perfect in a way.
Hm, hm, hm this sounds like an old science rap I remember when in highschool when the teachers were trying to teach according to the generation. Sadly I learned nothing there, and there does not seem to be much education here, but it does seem to flow quite well,
however feels skippable.
Goal:
General, General
It is generally general!
Closing Statment
I like poems to leave an impression, for it to yell an emotion at the reader. This feels like something, but the impression all I can see is...there, I feel like this is missing a emotional throw.
I hope I helped. Have Fun.
Thanks Zolen! This wasn't really meant as a poem full of meaning, but was made just for fun and practice. Thank you though!
Hey! Molly here to review! First off, happy review day! Second. I loved the depth of the poem. It holds so much meaning and I think that's so cool. It's sort of a unique poem. A lot of people write poems about tragedies and I think this one was just strange, but amazing. You seem to have a high level of knowledge and it shines through the poem. Happy review day and keep writing!
-molly
Thanks Molly! Happy Review Day to you too!
Hey
This was a great concept! Maybe it's just me, but I've never seen anything like it before.
You may want to keep in mind that an oxymoron, despite appearing contradictory, is still true. At some places, the terms don't really contradict (I don't know if this is important enough to pick out)
like, 'acting' is a verb, and you defined it to be acting of a certain type, to act 'naturally'. But that's up to you, because on a different scale, those two words do seem to contradict.
I really liked this part:
You used a rhyming couplet, which gave great closure. Not only that, the part with 'uniquely orthodox' was rather fresh. It's also quite clever
One thing I felt, however, was that I couldn't sense any defined direction to the poem. You did say it might not make sense, but this part here:
seemed out of the rest of the poem. Mostly because, the other parts can be somehow related to some facet of isolation, but this seems a little odd.
But on the whole, I really liked it as a concept for a poem! It was a joy to read.
Keep Writing~
-Binder
Thanks a lot!