PETA's sending me death threats again,
with spiders crawling through the mail
to amputate unsuspecting limbs
and scare the obnoxious mailman
all the way across the street,
where he belongs.
All it does is stoke my kitchen fire,
where I burn hardtack over pictures
of Xi Jinping and the dictionary page
on meaningful poured over
with a creamy sauce of existential meaning.
It's not healthy to have an ecomania
and watch the world fall from your feet
as I recoil over Wikipedia pages
on animalian cruelty to animals
while planning to frame my complacent neighbor
over the body sitting in the basement.
The most I can do when I see
a car against a tree, dripping radiator fluid
in red-orange rusty tendrils
mixed with a brown-black bark,
is stare at rolling clouds over office buildings,
hoping the black circles I paint
will add some kind of meaning to my life,
or at least give me a second chance.
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Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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140,667 Literary Works • 673,588 Reviews
Hi! Ashlingwolf here for review day! I love this poem. It flows really well, very smooth. Your word choice is fantastic. I really like the idea of a "creamy sauce of existential meaning." That was really nice. I din't see any grammatical errors but I will say, because I always say it: remember to proofread. I might space your ideas out a little more through the poem by making fewer longer verses or more shorter ones. This poem touches on some big issues so congratulations for that. Keep writing your poems and have a good life.
-Ashlingwolf
Well we'll my good friend this to me is
A very well written poem and it has a lot of
Meaning to it and I would love to write about
It for you.
Well first off I really liked it when you added
Everything together and making it sound very
Good and to me this is what a good poem is all
About. There are some other things I woul like to
Say and that is you are a very good writer and a very
Cool person if you ask me an that is a complement
Also I would like to say that you are one of the best writers
I have read today and that is very good saying that.
There were some parts that I didn't understand like when
You sayed give me a second chance and to me I really
Don't get that so if you ever get to read this please tell me
What you mean right in that part.
Your humble servant,
PusheenTheCat
Very Nice .... Nice theme . Liked it a lot ... I didn't quite get your message in the last paragraph .... you could be a little more transparent .... Good use of language and a pretty smooth flow has been maintained throughout . Cheers on that . You could shorten the length of your verses a little bit . Thanks for sharing your work !!