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Selling Faces in Classified Ads

by StoryWeaver13


Anyone tired of their identity? I'm currently looking to trade.
 
Maybe I'll put an ad in the classifieds: 
1995 Leo Female, 5'3" (at most),
pretty quiet most of the time - introverted - inexpensive - bit of a fixer-upper, though. 
cradle-Catholic turned agnostic - purebed doctor's daughter.
extremely awkward - shy - gets mad infrequently.
relatively athletic despite asthma and a bad knee. 
slightly-below-average looks mediated by slightly-above-average I.Q. 
parents fighting - brother institutionalized - mother losing it already.
familial gene pool leaning towards the "smart but crazy" variety. 
 
could be worse right?

 
forget the trade -
free to a good home. 


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Points: 490
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Sun Jul 21, 2013 3:04 pm
claiiirrre wrote a review...



This spoke to me on a deep level, how it's a girl describing herself, trying to sell her personality and social worth. I especially like the title; "Selling Faces in Classified Ads".
It seems quite futuristic-- as well as -- "Anyone tired of their identity? I'm currently looking to trade."
I'm going to take these in groups of 3 lines, after the aforementioned opening line.

// "Maybe I'll put an ad in the classifieds:
1995 Leo Female, 5'3" (at most),
pretty quiet most of the time - introverted - inexpensive - bit of a fixer-upper, though."
--- It sets the tone of the rest of the poem, one word, or short sentences as description. I like how it sounds like dialogue, all the bits in brackets.

// "cradle-Catholic turned agnostic - purebed doctor's daughter.
extremely awkward - shy - gets mad infrequently.
relatively athletic despite asthma and a bad knee."
--- Again, more description, and self-deprecating tone, off-hand humour.

// "slightly-below-average looks mediated by slightly-above-average I.Q.
parents fighting - brother institutionalized - mother losing it already.
familial gene pool leaning towards the "smart but crazy" variety."
--- Getting to the more serious side of things, and it's very well done, stays consistent to the first stanzas.

// "could be worse right?
forget the trade -
free to a good home."
--- I really like this, and in a few words it conveys a sort of exasperation that we can all relate to and I particularly like the "free to a good home" line, which makes it sound like the girl in this see's herself nothing less than a pet for their family.

Overall, this is a stunning poem and one of my new favourites. 10/10-- can't fault.




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Sun Mar 31, 2013 4:03 am
alanafiredancer wrote a review...



Hey, it's Firedancer here to review your poem!

I like the beginning of your poem the quote "Anyone tired of their identity? I'm currently looking to trade." I think that it starts the poem of quite nicely.

The unique structure of your poem is something that caught my eye that is for sure. To be honest I have never seen a poem structured quite like this before, but it was a necessary part for your poem I can see, as it is mimicking a classified.

I like the description "smart but crazy". I find that most people with smarts or creativity always have an odd and quirky side such as Einstein or Van Gogh. Einstein was autistic and Van Gogh was mental. So mental that he bit off his own ear, yet he was a creative painter who's works are still being discussed today. So "smart but crazy" is not something to be ashamed of, but to flaunt and brag about.

Overall, I like the creativity of this poem. Was it for English or did you pen it on your own? Keep up the good work and keep writing.




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Sun Mar 31, 2013 2:15 am
SkyeJane wrote a review...



Hey there Story Weaver! I think this is a really great piece you wrote here. It feels almost like it could be something you would here being said by the heroine at the start of a movie.
At first I wasn't sure if the bit where you ask if anyone is tired of identity was part of the piece itself,but then I slapped myself and saw just how necessary it was to start the whole thing off strong. And if it isn't part of the piece then it should be,because I like it and it's so easy to relate to. I would actually say yes if there was a way to trade identities.......so many people feel this way and I love that you touched on that.
The rest of it was really good too. In the description,you touched on some pretty weighty issues but somehow managed to even slip some humour in there with it to make it seem a bit lighthearted like it's all just a joke that's only a teensy bit twisted.
It almost seemed erratic,like it was a last resort and whoever wished to post this add actually intended on doing it just because they thought it would be funny but somewhere deep down they hoped for a reply saying"yes we want you..trade!!"
I loved the way it was tinged with wryness and irony.
The last line made me cry.
SkyeJanexxx





Be steadfast as a tower that doth not bend its stately summit to the tempest’s shock.
— Dante Alighieri