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140,481 Literary Works • 673,248 Reviews
Wow I'm not even dating anyone and this almost made me guilty
haha its brilliant. I love the last few lines. I was hooked from the first to the last line and I can't wait to see more of your work. Your take on the subject of an affair in poetic language is different and I love it. Keep posting! xxxx, Claire
wow that is amazing. i think it's very poetic, oviously. but really wow!
First I'd like to say that your style is realllllllly admirable and inspiring for me personally (And I don't use those two words lightly lol). Your word choices, the air of the scene--I adore it. It reminds me a little of my own style, too lol
In fact, I'm new here, but this is my favorite piece so far. After reading this, it makes me kinda want to get back to my own writing, and that's the best compliment I can give 'cause I've been imprisoned by Writer'sBlock lol
I really can't give any advice on improving this, I think it's lovely ^-^
Sorry I'm no help :p
Catnip~~
Hello! Nite here to review this lovely piece. Keep in mind I'm on my phone, so there may be typos.
Overall, great poem. There's some great imagery. It's wordy, but it kind of works because the words are so beautiful. I have critiques, but they're minor.
I think it would flow better if you cut out away.
Second stanza: I would start with the. It sounds stronger to me.
I also think it would read easier as two sentences, the second starting with "the stars were shameless". The line break there is also odd because it seems like a complete thought when it isn't. Maybe move up "confessions"?
The last stanza also feels like a run on to me. I'd consider making it two or three sentences to make it less confusing.
Overall, great images but work on the flow and sentence structure. Great job and keep writing!
This is beautifully written. I love the metaphors and similes used in this-absolutely fantastic.
There is honestly nothing I would change about this. This is wonderfully written and lovely to read.
This paints wonderful imagery; excellent job!
Very well done, keep it up!
~Kat.