Hello I am Firedancer here to do a review of your excellent poem.
First of might I say that this is a very descriptive and amazing poem considering on how long it took you? Two minutes is way to little for me to even come up with an idea, much less to hold and elaborate on it. The way that you thought up this in such a quick fashion is proof that you have creativity for sure.
I liked how you portrayed the night sky as a black piece of cloth and described as being delicate.
Yet I didn’t care when I was swept away
by the awe of the waking universe, rustled
by the shivering leaves of a pale
summer morning that draped trees in naked strands
of incandescent lacewing filaments of light. Okay this whole little stanza is amazing. Amazing and beautiful imagery. Very beautiful words to describe a summer morning.
I like how you fit the uncaring personality of youth. The time when we were all unconcerned by our looks and just reveled in the awe of youth, and "how the glory
of the world was what was more a phenomenon
than I could ever procreate before my own
unsatisfied eyes, doubled in the mirror."
Some people who do free verse take it as an excuse to be lazy and just scribble stuff down and usually I don't like it when they do that. You however, used very beautiful metaphors and imagery to efficiently and expertly convey your meaning into this poem.
Keep up the good work and keep writing for sure!
Points: 5634
Reviews: 27
Donate