When icicles hang by the wall
In gardens of blossoming flowers
I ache from the perfumes of spring,
You are my everything I dreamed.
I fear no more when you are near,
Your voice on the phone that calms my storm,
When the wind blows cold, it's you that takes hold
Your love is strong that keeps me moving along.
I have forgotten your face-
No longer remember your hands,
Forgotten your voice, your happy voice-
I have forgotten your eyes.
I needed you in my life.
Like a flower,
I am bound to my vague memory of you.
Your love I hold and I had never let go,
I was young and know I am old, hungering for you
To call me home.
I live with pain that is like a wound that cut me deep within,
like climbing vines on melancholy walls.
I will never forget your love,
Your love still lives within me.
Yet I seem to glimpse you in every window I walk by
Your face appear in a blink of my eyes,
Because of you, the heady perfumes of summer pain me-
You were the love of my life.
Because of you, I again seek out the signs that precipitates desires:
Shooting stars and falling objects of our love of long ago.
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140,455 Literary Works • 673,224 Reviews
"or it's your voice on the phone that..."
If you want another way to say forgot. you could use "Your voice eludes me". If you want. And possibly, "your eyes, I can't see" Just so you do not use forget so much.
"Your love i hold as I had never let go."
"I live with pain, like a wound, cut deep within me"
"for it still burns within me"
Hello Stegosaurus, may I can you Steggy?
It's MergSword here with a review for you!
First I would like to begin with what I like. I definitely like the introducing stanza. It's strong and emotional, which states what the rest of the poem will feel like.
Usually I criticize a lot when it comes to punctuation, but you did great, unlike many other poems I review! Although, the title should be capitalized.
I wouldn't be surprised if this work were to make into the literary spotlight, it's amazing, nice work and keep writing!
~MergSword
Thanks! ^^
This one gave me chills ♥ nice work c:
Thank you!
You're welcome .