in the coffin, he was dressed in a black suit
which he wouldn’t approve. he would want
a three-piece suit. he would prefer peach or
sky blue. i looked at him. it would be perfect
if tears flowed out of my eyes and blended
with the rain falling down my black umbrella.
i wore a black suit. i had to. as i leaned forward
to give him a last kiss, i could see what others couldn’t.
his eyes were closed, but in my mind, they
radiated the colours of the galaxy.
he smelled of jasmine and lavender that bloomed
over the fire. His mouth was closed, but i could hear
his laughter. his brother’s laughter. his friends’.
his mother’s. his brother’s. everyone he used to held
in one hand, determined to not let them slip away.
in the other, he held life. he controlled it
the way he wanted it to be, but it wasn’t enough.
tears escaped, finally. my lip was trembling
as i let it brush over his cheek, and I whispered,
may you incarnate when the world needs light again.
i left him, a part of me, as no matter how much fire
he had ignited in my soul, it would disappear
in a second when faced against the world.