If you want to know me
If you want to know my struggles
If you want a real chance to gain me, to love me
Then you must see through it
You must bypass the calm, the kind
Know the free, the giddy
Survive the sadness and the anger
Cross it all and open my door
And there, there you will find what holds it all together
The all I fight for
The beauty I see in every photo
The strength of each dress
The ramble of each writing
And the emotion from each one
The heartbreak hidden
The warrior fighting
The sanity in the madness
ME
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140,878 Literary Works • 673,697 Reviews
Hiya there again. Pastel here for a hopefully helpful review full of rambling Literally, this entire review is me rambling.
This poem is 100% perfect. I was sitting here for about five minutes, trying to find something to say that could help this poem improve; but I couldn't. This is one of the best poems I've read. The flow, wording, everything about it left me speechless.
The last line where it says "ME" was one of my favorites. I'm kind of getting a feeling that everything stated above this line describes the narrator, making them themselves.
I'm gonna have to end the review here because it is the definition of perfect and I could go on and on about how perfect this is but I have to do some chores. Cheers!
- Pastel
Thanks for the review! I'm really glad you found this poem so 'perfect'.
Hullo Junel! Cat here once again to review this lovely poem! Okay then, here we go!
If you want to know me
First, let's go through your poem together:
Spoiler
If you want to know my struggles
If you want a real chance to gain me, to love me
Then you must see through it
You must bypass the calm, the kind
Know the free, the giddy
Survive the sadness and the anger
Cross it all and open my door (Wow! So much emotions in this small stanza!)
-
And there, there you will find what holds it all together
-
The all I fight for (What? Did you mean more along to lines of 'All that I fight for'?)
The beauty I see in every photo
The strength of each dress
The ramble of each writing (Omg, I sooo understand this, I ramble sooo much!)
And the emotion from each one (So much emotions! I know this)
The heartbreak hidden
The warrior fighting
The sanity in the madness
-
ME
6/5/17
What I liked: This whole amazing poem!! This is definitely the best one yet!(Of the ones I've read)
What to fix/improve: Only that one line that was a little confusing, but other than that, you're good to go!
Other random comments: So much emotion shows in this little poem! I love it! ^^
Well anyways, amazing poem! Great job and keep writing!
I love the rhythm and the meaning of this poem. Can't really see much to recommend as an improvement since it seems nearly flawless. What threw me off a bit was the line about the strength of each dress. Each individual one of her dresses has a strength? Or does it mean the influence of her or his attire? What exactly does that mean? Also a colon after the word "together" would be nice.
Thanks for the review. I'm really glad you thought it was so good. The dress thing is referring to the fact that I design dresses.