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Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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Poems can be mad and useless. That's not wrong. But when you share a poem with people/readers, you need to make a certain point. I hope that helps.
I'm skeptical when it comes to rhyming poetry, primarily because of poems like this. This isn't structured properly. Rhyming poetry is incredibly difficult to pull off because if you want a proper piece, the rhymes need to /not dominate the poem/. This is awkwardly phrased and the syllables are all mismatched and it simply... doesn't flow. I personally would suggest trying out free-form, but I'm incredibly biased against rhyming poetry, so I suppose you can take my words with a grain of salt.
This seems less a poem and more, "I'm bored, I'll write this and it will occupy my time for a couple of minutes and then I'll post it because that's what I'm supposed to do with things I've written." Try going a bit deeper. I'm not saying disregard all poems that are light and fun, but don't limit yourself there entirely. Try incorporating new things, some vivid images to make us feeling the extent of your boredom, and it might be a bit more successful in that respect as well.
Yeah, you're right. Thanks.