Silver light
soft, stretched over your skin,
tight against its peaks and valleys
like sunlight on a placid sea -
Pressing my ear against your chest,
as solid as the warm earth,
I hear the sacred, silent truth
at the center of my universe.
Through eyes glazed with sleep,
a glimpse of Eternity
demands my attention
and draws me, enraptured, into its embrace.
Time looks on, and weeps
for what is lost in his wake:
All the beauty of existence
distilled into one fleeting moment.
A small glimpse of Heaven,
suspended in mind and memory,
takes root deep in my heart
and blooms throughout my body.
I do not fear Time, and I do not weep -
through awareness and gratitude,
nothing is lost.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
This one is slower and more peaceful. How did you ever get to the point where you could write this beautifully?
:'-) <3
your poems are so peaceful holy shit
Thank you
This is beautiful. It definitely evokes a feeling of peace, as well as slight mystery. I love how it shows that time is a small and fleeting thing, lost when compared to eternity.
Pretty much the only thing I can critique about the literary aspect of this piece is who or what it is being addressed to. It almost seems as if it could be romantic, yet it can appear as possibly religious. Maybe it is neither of these. I'm not saying it demands an explanation. Leaving it without one leaves room for the imagination. I would just definitely see value in making the goal clear.
This poem just made my day! I like how you wove in a mystical feeling into a love poem. It was a very gentle poem and I really liked that. The way you used words like weep and time was really good. Those words made the poem a sad kind of gentle, almost as if the person was silently crying. But that said when I read it, it was like a story. The first stanza was the person holding onto their special someone. The way you put it was really nice and sweet. in the fourth stanza it tells that the special someone has left. But in the last stanza the person is telling how they are not sad and how they don't fear time. I found it interesting how you wrote time with a capital "T". I'm no saying there's anything wrong with that because there isn't. Overall your poem was really nice. It portrayed a lot of feeling and thought. It also portrayed a sense of time. I really liked this poem! I can't wait to see what you write next!
is really good
is really good