Drama

by icanbefixed

Published May 22, 2010

In Poetry

A monster consumes eyes
with a fiery hate.
Instead of blood
there is water,
it's forced out--
gallons,
a single tear.

Fire spreads
through a crowd
in whispers that
protrude
your common sense--
ears burnt by a monster
no one sees
but everyone believes.

Hearing becomes seeing;
empty sockets
bear the mark
of the fiery monster:
water drips silently
but no one listens to it's pleas.

Seeing has been believing,
but hearing became seeing--
there's no surprise:
what people hear
in protruding whispers
throughout a crowd
is what they believe.

The monster's fiery hate
consumption--
a craving of sullen saltwater tears
feasting on all sight
blinding innocent bystanders,
that
in the first place
might not be so innocent.

But water always drips--
silently--
none to heed it's pleas.

A story
of humanity's drama.

Comments & reviews · 2
User avatar
StoryWeaver13
Review
StoryWeaver13 wrote a review Review · May 23, 2010

Good poem, and like the previous reviewer said, provoking. I'm not really sure as to why some things were italicized, though. Not really a distraction or issue or anything, but just something to point out.
Basically I have no complaints, other than the fact that some places seemed a little repetitive of others. I like it.

User avatar
ziggiefred
Review
ziggiefred wrote a review Review · May 22, 2010

Hello
Hmm. What a thought provoking poem. I like your style and what I enjoyed the most was the structure of the poem. It is different from what I see everyday. Good choice of words too.

Seeing has been believing,
but hearing became seeing--

That is...wow, I love that.

I seriously have nothing bad to say about this poem. It speaks to me and it speaks the truth.
Good job. keep writing.



But what about second breakfast?
— Peregrin Took