Such Sophistication

Okay, I have to review this. It's calling to me for a review.

Overall, through the poem, I have to say: commas. Punctuation in general, actually. After so many commas, the reader can begin to get annoyed with them. You don't need a comma after every line, and it's distracting in this poem, to say the least.

First, I would say, eliminate ALL punctuation. Then look at your lines like sentences instead, and put punctuation where it absolutely belongs. Full stops, commas, everything in the right place. Not just at the end of a line or stanza. I've actually done this in a word document in order to get the message the piece is attempting to convey.

I'll say very openly that your commas smother the message you seem to be trying to get across. I'm still not utterly sure what that is because of your repetition within the poem and it seems to be mostly about heartbreak... I think. The S's throw me off; while alliteration may be your aim, it also adds in with the commas to distract the reader throughout the entire poem.

I also don't quite agree with the repetition of the last word, because it seems superfluous and redundant and just... you don't need it. Y'know? You could leave it at just "such sophistication" and you would get the point of the last line across. Also, you might not want to capitalise "sophistication" in that phrase at the end, just because it's an obvious shout to the title and you probably don't want the readers thinking about the title and not the message of the poem.

This was just an all-over-the-place review because I really... can't find a concise way to review this. Yes, there's a message in there, but I feel like you need to pry it out of its shell and present it in a better way. I can't really help you with the content purely because, as it's written now, it's distracting. Maybe I'll look at it again in a bit and add to this, hm?

good job! nice prose.

Such Sophistication,
Sophistication.