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139,537 Literary Works • 672,600 Reviews
Good job!
Well, I really think there should be a little more punctuation in your poem. Sometimes it is hard to understand what you are trying to say, or what you are trying to put emphasis on.
But I really liked your poem. It is simple, short, and seems to flow without any effort. And the fact that words don't rhyme only makes it even better.
Congratulations!
Hi there!
I enjoyed reading this poem. It has good imagery and I can definitely feel the emotion in this. The flow of this is good too, there's not place I could find that the flow faltered. There's a couple comments/corrections that I have:
Shouldn't this be imagination?
There should be some more punctuation in this stanza. Right now, it just keeps going and doesn't stop. There's no pause where there should be and the reader can't figure out which words you're putting the emphasis on.
It should be stripped, right?
Overall I liked this piece. If you fix a couple of tiny thingd, it'll be great. Keep writing!