The bright blue box
with the strange mad man
crashed into my yard,
from my bedroom I ran.
He told me he'd help,
that he wouldn't be late,
so I sat on the ground,
and still, here I wait.
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140,925 Literary Works • 673,749 Reviews
I think this is a good poem. It's short and simple, but it has a lot of meaning to it. It shows us how Amy waited and waited, but he never came back even though he promised. I think she would've wrote this while waiting for the Doctor to return. The only thing I have to say is that I think you should have written her feelings too to make it a bit longer, but I guess that's only my opinion. Please keep writing more and improving as you continue writing.
Hi!
Okay, first of all, you had me at 'The bright blue box' (because I'm obviously mad about the Doctor). Second of all, I loved the poem regardless of the Doctor. It's simple, yet strong. It's saying a lot by not saying a lot (does that even make sense?). I like the rhyme, which I didn't notice the first time I read the poem. It's there but it's subtle. I wouldn't change anything about the poem, it's excellent as it is.
Keep on writing!
Hi
-
-My first review
I love this poem so, so much.
and here again
Your rhyme scheme is so on point, is cleverly placed, to move me through the poam as I read. I love it!!
Sometimes, it feels like the beat is off, like in the first four lines, where
seems too short compared too the rest of lines.
The balance is also seems off in the last four lines,
seems again too short compared to the rest.
Other than the slight off-balance in the lines, I love it. It makes me feel sad, and happy at the same time. My favorite line is
because it holds such power and emotion.
The poem could almost be talking about anything, but also stays true to you origonal topic! Love! Love! Love!
OMG this brought back so many memories and i actually love it you should do more of these or maybe write a story and ughhhh this would be so amazing
Is this a DW reference or am I sorely mistaken...
D:
THE FEELS!
I MISS AMY!
WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME?
But yeah, great poem.
Spoiler
SAAMMMEEE Amy was my favorite
Yeah, I love the poem as is- if you're really looking for something to change/ add you can always reference fish sticks and custard instead of just saying 'strange' for mad man
SAAMMMEEE Amy was my favorite
Yeah, I love the poem as is- if you're really looking for something to change/ add you can always reference fish sticks and custard instead of just saying 'strange' for mad man
SAAMMMEEE Amy was my favorite
Yeah, I love the poem as is- if you're really looking for something to change/ add you can always reference fish sticks and custard instead of just saying 'strange' for mad man
SAAMMMEEE Amy was my favorite
Yeah, I love the poem as is- if you're really looking for something to change/ add you can always reference fish sticks and custard instead of just saying 'strange' for mad man
Hey! Cello here-
Minor suggestion I just thought of
Maybe say
'The bright blue box
Inside, a mad man'
just a suggestion, maybe reword it a bit idk, but then it keeps with Amy's name of 'mad man' and it- eh, idk just an idea