I fall into books,
Like some fall into song,
I can feel my mind slipping
As I choose to read along.
I learn about the chosen one,
The one with the scar,
Whose regular muggle life
Turned suddenly bizarre.
I read about the little girl
Who stopped the big war,
With the ones by her side,
Which were legends before.
I would never be like them,
Even if I truly tried,
But when it says that they fought,
I knew I did alongside.
Like the girl with the pin
Who thought to rebel,
Or the boy with the pen,
Who into Tartarus fell.
My favorite has the dying boy,
With the violin as his heart,
And his cursed brother,
Whose world fell apart.
I connected with all of them,
Because even if they were fake,
They gave me comfort and joy
As well as heartache.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,008 Literary Works • 672,814 Reviews
Cassie with another review,
...
I hope you are having a great day!
This poem speaks so much into the hearts of readers. It was filled with so much emotion. So dead, yet so alive with passion and Joy.
I have nothing negative to say about this poem. It was truly great.
Keep writing because you are filled with spirit and heart that so many readers will enjoy.
I know I did.
This is a really sweet poem! I don't have many criticisms so just a few comments below:
I think this line would flow better without 'choose to' - As I read along works find on itsown.1. At the moment it's a bit too long to be a single stanza so I'd suggest breaking it into a couple. After 'bizarre' would feel like a natural place to end the first and start the second. Maybe after alongside for the next one?
2.
3.
Rather than repeat 'the one' in such close proximity, you could replace the second use with 'the boy'.
4.
Lovely ending and I think the flow is pretty smooth and it's a nice homage to reading and some of your favourite books. Thanks for sharing!
~Heather
I really loved reading this! ever since very young, I have been reading book. They really stick with me. Also nice punctuation and capitalization. Thank you for this wonderful read. I might not include "I can feel myself slipping"
(Sorry for bad English, I have to run through translate)
SilverBerry,
Oh my gosh you mentioned Percy Jackson *faints*
Okay now that that's out of the way...
This was a great poem. I honestly don't have that much to say. There are a few places where it could be divided into a couple sentences other than just one. Other than that this is one of the best poems I've ever read.Keep up the good work!!
TeenageSupergirl
This poem flowed very well. I thought that it really expressed how stories that are fiction can indeed still relate to our everyday lives. I complement you for relating the books emotions to yours. I thought that the poem sounded really professional. Keep writing stuff like this, it's fast and easy to read but also very entertaining and fun to read. I look forward to seeing more posts related to your poetic talent. Good job.