Broken World

by LizzyTyler

Published July 24, 2021

16+ Violence

In Poems

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for violence.

The stars fall from the sky,

As the Universe shakes the dew from it’s fur.

~

The sky crashes to the waves,

Fragments of blue shattering the noise from the earth.

~

Silence.

     ~

              Silence.
                   ~

                           Silence.
                                ~

The sun sets on a broken world,

Staining the splintered sky red with the blood of it’s inhabitants.

Comments & reviews · 3
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Katem_277
Review
Katem_277 wrote a review Review · Jul 26, 2021

I really love how you have portrayed the universe. Painting it as some form of animal is something I have never seen before.


Your writing is so gorgeous and descriptive and it really brings the poem to life. I especially liked "fragments of blue shattering the noise of the Earth" and felt myself rereading it over and over.

Overall the poem is amazing! You're an excellent writer, keep up the good work :)

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JohnKlue
Review
JohnKlue wrote a review Review · Jul 25, 2021

wow this is something Thought-Provoking.
The description makes me recall Norse Mythology. "As the Universe shakes the dew from IT IS fur."
yeah this feels like a Ragnorok. This is short but still very powerful. However I do not think this needed to be 16+. Kids around 12 could probably handle this.

overall this is good.

Thank you for your kind review! I suppose it wouldn%u2019t need to be 16 , but I wanted to be more safe than sorry. Again, thanks for the review!

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Engel Falke Review
Engel Falke wrote a review Review · Jul 24, 2021

I like that you have the Universe portrayed as a large beast (I'm guessing a wolf?). This is a very interesting concept. I like "The sky crashes to the waves, Fragments of blue shattering the noise from the earth." this is what truly drew me in, even if it was short, and I liked it nonetheless. I've looked over some of you stuff and it all seems well done, I think one of my favorites might be "Scars". You are the type of person that people will look up to even if you don't want them to (at least that is what I get from your work) and it is possible you don't know people are.

Have a good day!

Thanks for the review. Scars is one of my favorites as well!



Look, a good poem is a poem that exists. Any poem you write is better than the poem you don't.
— WeepingWisteria