Don’t be afraid of the dark, because whatever you’re scared of might not be able to see you.
The Dark,
Endless blackness,
Endless grief,
Endless unhappiness,
Endless shade,
The dark is something that makes you change, make you imagine things that are not there
The dark is a evil villain in our super hero life that’s goal in life is to destroy us
The dark is something that the earth can not live without, we need dark to tell us when it is night and when it is day
The dark is……. Untameable.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,571 Literary Works • 673,487 Reviews
Hey,
It's good. . . but not good as a poem.
I would try and expand on that last line and either make a short story or another poem, because as it stands it isn't that great of a poem.
PM if you want me to expand.
~Retro Disco666
Hello there. Cute avatar!
I liked the poem. I liked the flow of the first part.
That part.
And then the following parts...not so much. This is mainly to do with the structure. But I decided to look at it this way; The lines are lengthy than the rest of the poem to represent the "endless" you keep on mentioning in that stanza I liked so much, eh? Am I right?
Good job!
I like the last line!
I think, for the most part, this poem resembled more of a brainstorming session than an actual poem, if that makes sense. I mean, you have a lot of ideas, but they're kind of scattered and not really contained. So yeah. I would probably throw away the poem, keep the last line and expand on that.