Nate

I really liked it up to the end; your descriptions of the house and doors that don't creak anymore are very well done. It definitely instills a sense of dread ...

lol, I like the ending; definitely puts a different spin on it. I hate fast food for all the same reasons; except that is for Popeyes, Checkers and Subway. But ...

woah... didn't you say somewhere that you weren't good at writing poems??? This was very powerful and written very well. Plus the shocker at the end just causes an incredible ...

It sounds very repititive and very disjointed in places such as with "I stand in solitaire" and "Meaning is so apart from me." Both of those lines need some working. ...

Too much 'me.' You should use it to end just one line, and then think up other thinks. Also, if you're gonna do rhyming then you to change the scheme ...

I thought this was really good! The quotes and apostrophes are missing, but I think that has to do with something in the message system. I'll have to look at ...

I thought it was really good. You really love using analogies, and this is definitely the best you've used. It works out really well, and I like how you transform ...

For some reason, there's no apostrophe's. Probably a problem that occured when submitting. I like your use of comparisons and similies, but I think the poem would be more powerful ...

The 'd' in the eighth line needs to be changed to 'do.' Also, 'mmmm' sounds out place. It'd be better off as "Yum." I'm not sure what to think about ...

I thought that this was very, very powerful. It's one of the few things I've read lately that actually caused my chest to feel like it was sinking in. Very ...

I thought this was pretty good. However, you might consider changing "have" in the fifth line to "hold" and rearranging the seventh line to "No more blue I will be" ...

I like your use of contrasting; that is, contrasting the good in the song by Louis Armstrong with the bad of what you think is wrong with the world. But ...

It sounds very broken up right now. You have one rhythym going, but then you switch to another, and then switch back. There were some particular akward lines though: "Takes ...

I thought that this was extremely well done. It's incredible how you described what was happening without ever explicitly saying the word (and I won't say it here or I ...

This really touched me since I can relate to it. Happened a couple years ago at the summer camp I work at. There was an instructor who worked at the ...