Young Writers Society

Hello vampy! I'm here to review your short story. Let's dive in:

The Good Stuff

- I think you packed a lot of emotions and a powerful theme within such a small timeframe. I feel like this conveys the theme 'parents aren't always right', and the general idea of 'went against the odds', and you did it really well.

- The grammar in this was done really well! I saw no errors.

- I think the first sentence also had a very classical feel to it.

Room For Improvement

- Obviously, I'm going to say I wish this was longer XD. I think that mainly, I wish we saw more of the characters and their personalities, and why exactly they love each other. I think that it would add a lot of depth to the story.

Overall Opinion

- This was cute and heartfelt! I enjoyed reading it

Happy writing, and have a blessed day!

Serrurie

Hello hello, I hope you dont mind me popping in with a quick review. I will apologize that this might be very short. with this being said I still hope that my thoughts could brighten your day nonetheless. however, I should stop rambling and get started. let's get into it, shall we?

Overall I found this adorable. It's odd to find a purely wholesome story of yours but here we have the rare time there are no spooks. It was a nice change of pace as showing the light can make horror more impactful.

Still, there are hints that things might not be as idyllic as the kids think. It seems to me that his parents might be having some romantic problems considering what they have to say. However, love and growing up are bound to have ups and downs so it could be something else.

Now moving on to feedback I promise it will be pretty light. As always I am not a professional nor do you have to use anything I say. You are the author after all.

The biggest thing I see is that this doesn't have much detail. I won't try to beat a dead horse but I wish we got a little more prose to help add depth. Little things like adding more of the setting to help ground the reader and fleshing out the interactions could make the story more moving.

Regardless this was a cute little read. As always keep writing and remember to drink water!