E - Everyone

The Prophecy Ch. 3-4

CHAPTER THREE

Flames diffused the forest floor everywhere, devouring trees, bushes and everything in it's path like an angry beast. Fire winded it's way up trees burning them to crisp. Soot rose into the air refraining the sunlight from shining through. The cry of an immense dragon came from above filling Samuel's ears as he struggled to make his way through the thickening smoke.

A while ago, the large dragon apeared in the sky startling him and his knights half to death. The dragon was a mix of brown and red with pericing black eyes as sharp as daggers. It had burnt their camp but they escaped safely. Though Samuel had lost his companions, he was alone now trying to escape the dragon's furious flames.

He came face to face with a wall of fire but he escaped it by racing the opposite direction.

"Cynric!" He yelled but closed his mouth when it filled with smoke. He let out a hoarse cough and moved on.

Soon all was quiet and he stopped in his tracks unknowing if the dragon was still there or not. He began walking again until he finally reached a spot where smoke was little and his eyes got clearer and clearer.

"Cynric! Where are you?!" He called again.

"Cynric!" But he heard nothing. Then his chest gave a pang. What if they were killed by the dragon? Or burned by the simmering flames?

He just stood there watching the remaining flames flicker until they faded away leaving smoke rising into the sky. Then he turned walking into the unharmed trees. He wondered what he would do now for he couldn't slay the black dragon all by himself. He spotted a dead tree lying on the ground covered in moss. He sat down and took out his container filled with water and took a deep sip.

Cold, water slid down his throat making him feel better and refreshed. But then thoughts returned to him causing him to become even more depressed. He hoped he would meet up with Cynric and the other knights later or by nightfall.

Samuel slid to the leaf covered ground and leaned his back to the tree closing his eyes. He stayed that way until the sun sunk beneath the horizon.

That next morning, the feel of the warmth of the sun rested on his face. Samuel opened his eyes seeing bright rays of sunlight shining through the tree tops. He felt his stomach rumble with hunger. He touched it and then stood glancing around the forest. First he would hunt for food and return home to tell his father the trategy he encountered. He clutched the hilt of his sword, unsheathed and started his hunt for some meat.

He strolled through the forest keeping an eye out for any deer, moose or other animals. Suddenly he heard a strange noise coming his way. He cocked his head to one side. This noise sounded familiar though. A pig? he thought. He so hoped so. The noise go closer until he realized it was a pig.

"He pig out in the forest?" he muttered to himself.

There it was. A full grown pig advancing toward him, it's curly tail bobbing in the back. When the pig saw him, it stopped staring at him.

"It would be nice to have some bacon," Samuel said. As if the pig had understood what he said, it squealed and ran back the way it had come.

"Hey!" Samuel exclaimed chasing after it. "Dumb pig!"

He dived foward reaching out grab it in his hands, but it slipped out from under him. Samuel growled and chased it again. But he stopped until he came to an unexpected cottage. It was a small cottage. The outside walls were a light brownish color, the boards moldy and scrapes pealing from the boards. Vines stretched along the sides and one of the windows were broken and the front door was slightly opened.

Samuel stood in front of the door and knocked. After a long wait, a big strong man opened the door. Mucles rippled his arms and his eyes were gray. His flaming red hair reached his shoulders and he had a strong firm jaw.

"What do you want?" he demanded in a gruff, low voice. Samuel eyed him and replied catiously,

"I'm lost in the forest and I was just searching for food."

"What's your name?"

"Samuel, sir."

"The names Herman," he told him.

"Herman-- that's-" Samuel stopped when Herman stepped closer, his eyes narrowed.

"Um, yeah, ok. Nice to meet you." Herman didn't reply but moved out of the way so Samuel could enter.

The kitchen was tiny and the dining area wasn't very big.

"Sit." Herman ordered. Samuel obeyed and sat down. The chair creaked when he settled himself.

Later, after Samuel sat quietly, Herman came back in holding two plates with warm, steamed (meat) drumbsticks on them. Samuel dug in once it was placed in front of him.

"So," Herman said sitting across from him. "What made you get lost in this forest?" Samuel looked up from his food.

"My knights and I were attacked by a dragon the day before today," he replied.

"You and your knights?" Herman asked. Samuel nodded and stood up.

"I am Prince Samuel." Herman just blinked. Suddenly he was laughing.

"You? Prince samuel?" The young man grimaced.

"But I am!"

"Then prove it!" Herman replied.

"I will." Samuel stood there uncertain. How would he prove that he was the prince? Then he remembered his father's sword. He took it out of his scabbard and handed it to the hermit. Carved in the blade was,

KING SETH

Herman threw up his hands and confessed," I believe you now." Samuel grinned and sat back down.

"So why were you and your knights out here?" Herman questioned.

"My castle was attacked by a Black Dragon so I came out here slay it." Herman's eyes flashed with interest.

"What was that you said?" he asked.

"My castle was attacked by a Black Dragon..." the prince replied slowly.

"Black Dragon?" Samuel nodded.

"I know, I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw it."

"I don't understand, I thought Black Dragons didn't exist anymore." Samuel nodded.

"I do too. But I know that it was a Black Dragon."

Herman stood up and walked to the window to look out. He put a finger under his chin in thought.

"Long ago they roamed this world freely causing destruction wherever they went. People believed them to be the most furious, powerful dragon of all. Slayers could not slay them. Not even Romon Blaize."

"Romon Blaize?" Herman nodded.

"He was the most known slayer in the land. (My great, great, great and so on grandfather.) But he was killed trying to slay a Black Dragon."

"And then the Black Dragons began to disapear," Samuel continued and Herman nodded.

"Will you help me?"

"What?"

"Find the Black Dragon and kill it."

"No, I cannot. You canno't. You will not be able to slay it, Samuel." Herman answered stoutly.

"But Zilda is in trouble! And so is my kingdom! We can't let this dragon run loose!" Herman looked at him with an unsure look on his face.

"But it will be impossible."

"Not if we believe we can,"Samuel argued.

"If no one could, maybe we can." The prince's hard gaze rested on his. They stood there until the hermit nodded his head
***

"What kind of dragon was that?" Danielle asked Mue as they cooled off under some tall pinetrees.

"A rust dragon," the squirrel replied searching the skies nervously.

"I hope it doesn't come back," Danielle said looking upward as well.

"We should stay below the trees just in case," Mue suggested.

"So where do Rust Dragon's live?"

"Usually in rocky areas like mountains. Mountains is mostly where all dragons live," Mue informed her.

"What about Black Dragons?" Mue stared at her and shrugged.

"I heard they don't exist anymore."

"Really?" Mue nodded.Why? And why was I transformed into one?Danielle thought.

Her stomach rumbled.

"I guess I didn't get enough to eat," she said. All of the sudden she heard Mue gasp.

"What is it?" She asked.

"It's back," Mue replied pointing toward the sky. There it was. The enormous Rust Dragon was flying over head, it's wings extended to both sides.

"Wow." Mue nodded in agreement.

"Let's stay down." Danielle and him backed furthur into the trees. They watched as the dragon circled from above.

Danielle felt her stomach rumble once again. She was so hungry that she looked around her for any food forgetting about the danger near them. Her eyes moved around until they rested on a family of large rats. She felt herself drooling as she began to move slowly toward them.

"Danielle!" Mue hissed. "Don't move!" Too distracted to listen, the dragon got closer to the rats not realizing how clear the trees were becoming.Here I come, rats.Danielle thought to herself.

"Danielle!" Mue shrieked. This time, Danielle stopped in her tracks glancing upward. The other dragon had spotted her and her new found prey. It was diving toward them dashing through the air with ultimute speed.

"Get away from there!" Mue hollard.

But Danielle wasn't about to let her food be taken by this other dragon. She crouched in a fighting position when the Rust Dragon hovered overhead. It roared causing Mue to take shelter in a prickly bush. Suddenly, the dragon lunged at her compeling her to dodge it. Then she flew into the air as well just as the dragon landed in her spot. It glared at her and followed her lead.

"Come and get me!" She cried flying upper into the sky. She looked back to see the other dragon chasing her. His wild, golden eyes burned into her's. Unexpectedly, she felt his sharp, jagged teeth sink into her tale making her howl with pain. She successfuly shook him off but the wound stung and blood spurred out. Then the dragon lunged at her forcing both of them to fall from the sky. It's jaws snapped at her but she moved away nipping at his wing. She bit into the warm flesh making a large tear. The dragon roared and released her. She was free to fly but not of this creature. She noticed his ability to fly was weakened but he kept himself up in the air. He attacked her again, this time aiming for her neck. She escaped it and instead have her teeth sink into his neck. He roared and struggled to get away. His claws scratched at her body causing her to wince as the claws teared at her skin. She finally released her opponent.

The dragon opened it's mouth and released a powerful fiery breath.

***

"What in the world!" Herman yelled. Samuel looked to the sky as well and gasped in fright seeing two winged figures. One was a lot bigger than the other, lighter too. Samuel watched them as they fought, biting at eachother's flesh. This is when he realised that the smaller dragon was the one he was searching for.

"Herman! The black dragon!" He said. Herman nodded.

"Come on." Samuel followed the man but still kept his eyes on the battle. The bigger dragon had breathed fire almost covering the Black Dragon with it.

"Maybe the Rust Dragon will get rid of it for us." Herman said hustling through the trees with Samuel behind. But they stopped when they saw the rust dragon falling toward the trees.
***
"Samuel and our knights haven't treturned for two days now," Queen Isabel was saying to her husband. King Steven sat on his throne with Seth and Isabel standing next to him.

"I wonder if..." Maralyn trailed off.

"I'm sure they're fine," Steven said. Although it didn't make anyone feel better. Samuel... where are you? Seth thought.

"Father!" The four of them looked up to see Prince Adrien standing before them. Just by his face, they knew something was wrong.

"What is it?" Steven said standing from his throne immediatly.

"Some of the knights have returned!"

"What do you mean some?" Seth asked and then demanded, "What about Samuel?"

The four kings and queens followed Adrien into the training grounds to find a group of knights covered in dirt and what seemed to be ashes. Samuel was no where.

Steven went up to one of the knights.

"What happened?" The knight's eyes met his. It was Cynric, he realised.

"A rust dragon attacked our camp burning with flames.We decided to come back here."

"What about Samuel?" Seth asked him. His voice wavered with nervousness and he felt cold sweat. He felt sorrow and despair when Ceynric looked in his direction.

"We couldn't find him." Seth just stared at him and the knights as if it were a tragedy no one could bear. Isabel touched his shoulder gently with tears beginning to form. Adrien went over to Ella who stood nearby. He noticed she was shivering and her face was white as snow. He pulled her into a soft embrace. She sobbed.

Samuel's sisters, Silia and Sariah also stood beside her tears glinting in their eyes.

"Samuel," Sariah muttered. "I hope he's alright."

"I know he is," Silia replied trying to remain calm.

"First Danielle and now Samuel? Why is this happening?" Ella wondered. Adrien shook his head.

"I don't know, but we will get through this together, right?" He said wiping a tear from her cheek.

"You should all go get cleaned up," Maralyn told the knights. She watched them leave the training grounds. Some of them were coughing or maybe injured. Anger seemed to build inside of her. Why? She asked herself. She turned to see her husband and Seth standing there unknowingly what to do next.

What should I do? Steven wondered. Danielle was gone, captured by Andorra or otherwise dead. Samuel was lost in the forest or maybe killed by the rust dragon.

Hmmm, seems you're having alot of problems brother. Steven flinched when the voice entered his head.

Andorra, what do you want? He thought back.

Just my rightful throne to the kingdom. She replied.

It won't happen.

Really? Why don't we just have a little battle over it then.

I-I can't do that. No war. Steven answered.

You are afriad then? I thought you said you would defend your kingdom no matter what!

It took a while for Steven to reply.

Will Danielle come back?

Only if you beat me.

If it's the only way to get my daughter back and defend this kingdom... then I will go to war with you.

Wonderful was the last word her heard from Andorra.
***
Andorra smirked. Her plan was working exactly as she wanted it. She laughed as she stared out her window.

"My brother can't defeat me. He is too weak. He has no magic, only knights. I have so much more." She smiled down at the million lights glowing in the night below. She lived in a necropolis. A kingdom of the dead; full of skeletons, zombies and vampires. She looked up to see several wyverns swarm above the necropolis watching for any intruders.

Andorra thought, my army will be the greatest in all history
***
Ella roamed the castle halls bewildered by the events of the past. Her heart ached for Danielle and for Samuel. What if both of them were dead? What if I never see them again? She thought. But she shook the thoughts away. She had to believe they would return and everything would be back to the way it was before.

She made her way into the servant's quarter's to see the knights that had returned being treated by some of the servants. There was a fireplace lighting the room and the knights were sitting on chairs the servants put out for them. She recognized one of them known as Cynric. Maybe she could ask him questions about Samuel and the attack.

"Excuse me?" She asked politly coming up beside him. She noticed a deep cut on his arm with blood dripping out. The young knight looked up at her with strikingly blue eyes.

"Are you Cynric?" She asked him. He nodded.

"And you are Princess Ella?" She nodded.

"I was just wondering, um about the attack."

"Why?" He questioned. For some reason she found herself blushing.

"I just want to know how you lost Prince Samuel."

"Ah, are you in love with him?" He asked. Ella's face reddend even more.

"I thought so. Well, It happened when we were inside our tent planning for our attack on the black dragon. Samuel left for he had to check on something when suddenly we heard the roar. We ran out of the tent to see the dragon blowing fire everywhere burning our supplies and other tents. Smoke and flames rose so we couldn't see anything. That's when we lost Samuel."

"That's terrible," Ella replied. She felt tears come to her eyes but she refused to cry in front of the knight. She then saw him grimace.

"Are you alright?" She asked. Remembering the deep cut in his arm, she raced to find a wet cloth.

"You don't need t-!" she heard Cynric call after her but she already prepared the wet cloth. She went back to him and began to clean his wound.

"No, really you don't need to do this," he said.

"It's ok," she replied. When all the blood was cleared, she wrapped another cloth around his arm.

"Th-thankyou," he replied


Danielle dogded the raging flames that came from the dragon's mouth. Then before she could move her opponent rammed into her body making her cry out in pain. Her body was shaking and bloody dripped from the scratches that were put upon her.

She kept fighting the dragon using as much power and strenght she could in her new form.

When she had the chance, she bit the dragon's other wing so hard ripping it from the dragon's body. He was falling now, cascading downwards to the jagged, needle like rock below. Danielle watched in horror but was also relieved she survived this fight.

She found Mue lying near a shade of trees covered in thorns. He was groaning and didn't seem to notice her.

"I did it Mue! I did it!" She said landing heavily before him. He lifted his head but his only reply was a groan.

"Mue? Didn't you see? I beat that Rust Dragon!"

"Wow," the squirrell replied sitting up. He began pulling out the thorns from his tale.

"I have never done anything like that before!"

"Mmmhmm."

"Now where are those rats."

"They ran away," Mue said. He pulled out one thosrn but shrieked.

"They must have gotted scared," Danielle thought.

"No duh."

"Now my food is gone!" She cried searching to see if anymore were still around.

"Ow, ow, ow!" She heard Mue say.

"What happened?" She exclaimed.

"Here let me help you." She bent her head down and gripped three needles with her mouth. She yanked.
***

"I was wrong about that dragon. Now I can see how powerful they really were."

"A dragon like that can destroy a whole kingdom. That's what my father told me," Samuel said. He walked fast beside Herman. They were heading toward the place where they saw the Black dragon land.

"I'm sort of nervous. When we try to slay it this might be my last day to live." Samuel thought of his whole family and Ella. He and Ella were engaged and he had a feeling it wold be a while before they would marry.

"If you doubt yourself like that, this will be your last day to live. My father told me to be a man you shouldn't doubt yourself," Herman replied. But he suddenly stopped.

"Did you hear that?" He asked.

"What?"

"I heard someone scream."

"Do you think the dragon is attacking someone?"

"I don't know."

The prince followed Herman through a crowd of think trees.

***

"Just hold still Mue."

"But it hurts so bad!"

"All the pain will be gone once I get all these needles out." She gripped four more thorns and pulled them out quickly.

"Ow!" Danielle rolled her eyes.

"Just don't think about the pain."

"How could I not think about the pain? And what about you, you're coverd in scratches."

"There's only three more left."

Once the thorns were out of Mues, body, they both slumped to the ground in exhaustion.

"Defeating that dragon took all of my strength. And I'm hungry."

"That fight was worth nothing," Mue replied. Danielle didn't answer but closed her eyes. She hadn't bothered to care for her wounds she got from her battle. All she wanted was sleep

"Wake up!" Mue hissed into Danielle's ear. But she lazily moved her head away.

"Not now father," she replied sleeply.?

"Danielle!" Mue exclaimed. This time she opened her eyes halfway.

"What is it?"

"Some one is here," he replied in a low, quiet voice. Danielle just layed there wide awake now. She stared into the forest imagining anything to pounce on them any second.

"Maybe it's just an animal," she said. Mue shook his head.

"No it's-"

They unexpectedly heard one or more battle cries pop out of the forest making them to jump frantically. Mue took protection in between her wings as she turned to meet their attackers. Two men were rushing at her with swords aimed toward her body. She stood there in shock for a while until she realised what was really happening.

She pounced out of the way just before their blades could peirce her flesh. They lashed at her again but she dodged every one of their swings. What is with these guys? She thought. She tried to catch a glimpse of their faces but her eyes were too focused on the swords. It seemed they weren't going to stop thrashing. This made her anger rise inside of her making her growl indignatly. I should fight back. Danielle thought as she jumped farther out of their reach.

It was only a few seconds that she caught sight of the young man's face. She realised she knew that face and couldn't believe it. Samuel? It couldn't be! But who in the world was this other man? She wanted to shout Samuel's name and let him know it was her but would he understand her?

On the other hand, Samuel and his other companion were circling her now breathing heavily. I have to do something before they kill me. She turned to Samuel noticing his agitated expression. It seems he really wants me dead. 

Immediatly, he began running at he but she stood there appalled and too trapped in her trance of confusion.

"Danielle," she heard a voice.

"Danielle, do something!" Mue called. He was peeking out from under her wings. "He's going to kill you!" He exclaimed.

"But he's prince Samuel!" she replied. But before anything else was said, Danielle turned to meet the blade that would pierce her skin. And end her life.

If he killed me, he nor my family would ever know what had happened to me. She thought. I will never see my family again. Father, mother, Adrien... and Ella. No, my life cannot end like this.
***

Samuel was racing for his victory. I can't believe this was so easy! He thought. The dragon didn't even attack them once. His hands tightened around the hilt as he drew closer. Soon he would plunge his sword into it's body and then it will die. He'd be able to home peacefully and everything would be back to the way it was. He would marry Ella and live happily ever after.

"This dragon is done for good!" He sneered. His speed increased and he found himself nearly slaying his very first dragon. A Black Dragon.

He swung his sword causing chimes to deflect from the blade as it careered through the air. He put all his strength to his father's sword. This was it. The first Black dragon would be slayed.

But he stopped. For he heard another voice stop him. He looked up with an alarmed face. Who... was that? Samuel glanced at Herman then to the dragon.

"Samuel," the voice called. Herman and Samuel started blankly at the dragon in bewilderment.

"It's me, Danielle."

Samuel squinted in confusion. Danielle? Ella's annoying younger sister? How could this be? He stared at her in disbelief.

"Don't you remember me? It'm Danielle," the dragon continued. Herman glared at Samuel.

"What's going on?" He questioned. Samuel just looked into her eyes. Sweat dripped down his face as thoughts ran through his mind. Danielle? 

"It's really me," the dragon concluded. It was her voice and those green eyes perfectly matched Danielle's. Samuel lowered his sword in defeat. He was this close to slaying his first dragon but it turned out to be the lost princess.

"Oh it's you," he said bluntly. Danielle felt like squishing the prince in her claws right then and now for talking like that.

"Samuel," the bigger man said. Samuel turned to him.

"Herman, that's Princess Danielle of Zilda. She went missing a few days ago."

"Do you mean to tell me that this dragon is actually a princess?" Herman replied in shock. Samuel nodded.

"But how?

"I have no idea."

"Then what do we do with her? Take her back to the kingdom?" Herman asked.

"No that would alarm to kingdom. I think our only choice is to find a way and turn her back," Samuel answered.

"How in the world will we do that?"

"Excuse me!" Danielle inturrupted the conversation. "I'm right here you know." They backed away from seeing how close her mouth was to them.

"Danielle?" Another voice apeared.

"Is it over? Did you kill them?"

"Oh Mue!" She exclaimed and opened her wings. The squirrel climbed her neck and sat on top of her head.

"Mue, this is Prince Samuel and..."

"Herman," the man finished. Mue just sat there and said nothing.

"You made friends with a squirrel," Samuel said.

"Yes. He was the only friend out here I could find. Besides, I was lonely," she replied. Mue nodded his head in agreement.

By changing the topic, Danielle asked Samuel why he was out in the forest.

"I think I should be asking you that question. What happened to you?" He asked curiously. Danielle hesitated and started from the beginning, all the way from the ball and until now.

" The witch said her name was Andorra and that she wanted to take my father's throne for herself. She also said that I was part of this plan although I don't know what. So she changed me into this body." Samuel and Herman glanced at eachother.

"I think..." she continued.

"What?" Samuel questioned.

"Maybe if we find another witch, she can reverse this spell." Surprisingly, Herman shook his head.

"Even if we find another witch, she won't be as powerful as this one. This sort of power is rare upon witches, wizards, and sorcerers. Anyways, witches cannot reverse another witch's spell." Danielle looked to the ground in dismay. If no other witch can changer her back then the only one is... Andorra. 
***

Judas took his dagger from his belt and held it toward the sunlight. It's silver blade reflected the light causing it to shine brightly. He found a smooth stone and began to slide it against the edge of the blade creating a sharp, high pitched hissing sound. He closed his eyes and relaxed taking in the sun's heat and enjoyed the sound as it rang in his ears.

Judas was a man in his fourties, strong, bold features and incredibly smart. He lived his whole life in the forests. It was his home. The place where his life had all begun. His parents lived in a smal village in the woods where he was born and raised in his childhood. But when he was thirteen his parents died from a terrible sickness that had passed through the village killing many people. He had lived alone from then on in loneliness and traveling aimlessly through forests. But he soon joined a gang of bandits. Years passed and he was made leader of the gang.
After a few strokes, he threw the stone to the ground and tenderly rubbed his finger over the blade. Perfect. He though and sheathed his dagger.

"Judas!" A voice came from behind him.

"What is it?" He scowled and stood up. He turned around to see younger face peering back at him. Alec.

"Well, what do you want?" Alec's hand was pressed against a pine tree and he was prectically slumped over, breathing heavily.

"You... you've got to come... see this," Alec replied in between gasps.

"Show me," Judas said following him down a narrow path.

It wasn't long until they came upon a small group of people standing above a deep ditch. They turned to him and Alec with pale faces. These people were his bandit gange. There were about four men and one woman. The woman was Shannon, a sweet but tough lady who could hunt and cook anything. That was the main reason they allowed her to be part of their gang anyway.

"What is it? What happened?' Judas asked harshly.

"Look down there," Shannon told him motioning toward the ditch. He came up beside them and looked down. With a horrified gasp, he found himself staring at a large, light colored dragon laying motionless. Parts of it's body were shredded revealing blood stained rocks. Apart from it was it's wing completely torn from it's body.

"We saw what happened boss," Alec said.

"It was right above our heads! Two dragons were battling eachother, lunging at eachother's throats. One of them was black."

Judas became confused of why Alec mentioned that one of the dragons were black. But he let him resume.

"Well, this dragon was defeated." Judas's gang turned to him and one man close to his age called, Storm, said,

"The Black Dragon flew that way and landed." Storm pointed north from where they stood and Judas nodded.

"We will head that direction and see if we can find it," he replied and started walking. His bandit gang grabbed their weapons and followed.

"But why are we following it?" Alec questioned. After a while, Judas answered,

"I wanna know if it's for real."

CHAPTER FOUR

Danielle opened her eyes and looked to see Herman walking
back through the bushes. He turned his head and met her eyes.

“Did I wake you?”He asked with concern.

“It’s alright,”she replied. She felt Mue laying against her side sleeping soundly and she smiled. Then she glanced at Samuel. Her eyes moved downward to see the fire he had just built.

“Isn’t that a bit small?”She questioned. Samuel looked at
her but rolled his eyes.

“It’s the best I can do,”he replied bluntly. Herman kneeled beside him and dumped a few logs and leaves into the flames causing them to grow more. Danielle felt herself smiling but when Samuel looked at her, he rolled his eyes again. They were like that for a while until Herman stood up and walked over to Danielle.

“Let’s check you for any wounds you got from that dragon,”he said and touched her scales. She shivered under the touch but relaxed after a few seconds.

Samuel sat watching them but shifted his position so he was seating with his back facing them. Why Danielle? How is it possible for her to defeat a dragon? She’s… a princess. For some reason jealousy engulfed him. I’m weak. He thought to himself He didn’t want to be weak. Especially in front of his father. Every time they would go hunting together, he wanted to impress him, show him that he could fight beside him. Now what would he think of him? What would Ella think?

“Samuel,”Herman said, interrupting his thoughts. “Bring me my sack.” Samuel lazily got to his feet and found Herman’s sack near a bush. He picked it up and brought it to him. Herman took it, shuffled through it and took out a long piece of cloth. He then pressed it against her scales.

“You have some deep cuts in your skin but they aren’t severe. But there’s still some blood coming out from some of them. I found a cut on your nose but that has turned into a scar,” he told them. Danielle glared at Samuel and he glared back.

“What?”He asked.

“You know what!”Danielle replied. “You attacked me!”

“What? Me? You were the one who attacked me!” He yelled back. Danielle looked
away and she muttered,

“When I turn back into my normal self this scar better no be there.” Frustrated, Samuel went back to the fire and sat. Herman just watched them unknowingly and continued cleaning her wounds. Once he finished they all sat in silence until the fire burned out and only the moonlight shone down on their sleeping figures.

"Andorra!" She cried as she ran through the tall, dark and misty trees. Her footsteps and her breathing were the only things heard in that dark night.

"Andorra!" She called again. "Where are you?" There was no reply but she kept scouring through the dark forest in search of the witch. 

"I need you Andorra! Andorra!" She stopped in her tracks looking in all directions but there seemed to be no one in sight. She began to run again calling her name repeatedly until her voice began to fade slowly.

"Danielle." A voice apeared out of the darkness. "I'm right here. In your mind."


"Andorra!" Danielle jerked her head up. She stared into the dark with fright in her eyes but layed her head back down and closed her eyes.

"Andorra,"she said.

****


Something unexpectedly brushed against his nose which made it tickle. When Samuel awoke, the tip of the black dragon’s tail brushed against his cheek.

“Ugh!” Samuel sat up and rubbed his nose. He scowled at Danielle and moved away from her. But as he watched her, he noticed her body jerking and her head moving from side to side. He scooted closer and carefully touched her nose.

"Danielle,"he said. "You need to wake up now." He waited until her eyes opened but surprisingly they didn't. What's going on? He wondered. Wait, what am I doing? He backed away holding his hand in front of him. That was his first time touching a dragon and for some reason he liked feeling the smooth scales against his skin. His eyes rested on Danielle once more and he touched her scales.

"Danielle," he said. "Wake up." Her eyes flew open and she swung her tail that it knocked Samuel into the trees. He landed heavily on the ground and groaned for pain shot in all directions throughout his body. He looked over at her to see that she was watching him.

"I'm so sorry Samuel!" She cried. "I-I didn't mean to!"

"It's okay," he replied.

"Are you two fighting again?" Herman asked. He was standing with his arms folded and his sack over his shoulder.

"No, we weren't," Danielle replied glancing at Samuel.

"Hmph." Herman began to kick their campfire causing the sticks to scatter across the ground.

"Why are you doing that?" Samuel asked.

"We don't want any bandits to follow us now do we?" Samuel didn't reply but turned back to Danielle who sat there musing.

"I have a feeling that I know where we should go," she said and turned her head to the left and gazed at the mountains in the distant.

"How?" Samuel asked.

"I just have this strong feeling that that is where we are supposed to go." Herman and Samuel glanced at eachother in bewilderment.
***

Steven looked up from his plate and saw that everyone were eating slowly with their heads hunched over. He could tell they weren't happy with the idea of having a war between he and his sister. But it was the only way they could get Danielle back. He had to. He looked at Ella. She was the most depressed of all of them for she having lost Samuel and her sister. He touched her hand and cupped it in his. She looked at him with red, sad eyes and managed to give a little smile.

After breakfast Ella stood on the balcony overlooking the forests. I know you're out there, Samuel. She thought. Please come back.

"Hello?" Ella jumped when she heard a voice . She turned around to see Cynric standing there with a bandage wrapped around his arm. Realizing she had been crying, she hurriedly wiped the tears from her cheeks and stood up straighter like princesses did.

"Yes? What is it?"

"Are you alright?" he asked. She nodded slowly.

"Is that all?"

"Well, I was wanting to thank you for taking care of my arm," he answered. Trying not to cry she nodded again.

"Y-your welcome," she replied and turned around to look back at the forest. She didn't want anyone to see her tears which is why she was so distant from the others. She still felt Cynric's presence as they stood there feeling the light breeze against their skin.

"You miss them terribly, don't you?"Cynric said standing beside her. Ella nodded and wiped a tear before it slid down her cheek. He touched her shoulder but she shook it off.

"You shouldn't be so worried, it just makes things more complicated. Whenever I'm in a sad mood I try to be in a positive mood and everything turns out right. It also affects the others around you. Have you seen your family? They are a lot like you right now, depressed and sad. But you can change that by changing your mood." Ella looked at him and saw that he was smiling. For come reason something inside of her changed. Seeing the smile made her feel less sad.

"Oh yeah, your father wants you to come inside where it's safe," Cynric said and went back inside. Ella watched him until she turned back to the forest and thought about what he said. Maybe he's right. She thought. Maybe this will all be over soon.


"Danielle is coming for me,"Andorra said. She smiled. "Soon it will all be done and darkness will triumph over all this land."

"Andorra,"said a low voice from a dark corner of the chamber.

"Yes what now?"

"What about the prophecy?" The voice replied. Andorra rolled her eyes.

"I told you the prophecy doesn't mean anything. Besides, Mystra is trapped away some where so the prophecy cannot come to pass. Without Mystra, no prophecy." Andorra opened her chamber doors and was about to walk out before the voice stopped her.

"You believe in this prophecy don't you? Which is why you want to change it." Andorra stood there unmoving for a moment until she stepped out slamming the door behind her.

***

Danielle crouched low to the ground waiting for Herman, Samuel and Mue to climb aboard her but they just stood there gaping. She stared at them and sighed.

“Come on, this will be faster traveling to the mountains than on foot! Trust me!” She exclaimed and waited for any of them to respond. Herman and Samuel just glanced at each other but Mue scurried to her and climbed her neck until he sat atop her head. He looked at the others with his beady, black eyes and asked with a chuckle,

“Are you two cowards?” Samuel turned to him and glared daggers at the squirrel. Then he and Herman put one foot on Danielle’s leg and lured themselves onto her back. Samuel wobbled a bit but he wrapped his arms around Danielle’s neck so he stayed on. 

“How did that squirrel learn to speak anyway?” he asked bitterly. No one answered now that Danielle was standing on all fours with her wings stretched out to her sides.

“Herman, are you sure about this?” Samuel asked.

“I am sure we’ll be fine,” Herman replied. Danielle smiled to herself. She would make Samuel’s first flight one that he wouldn’t ever forget. 

“Here we go!” She said and lifted off into the air heading straight on farther and farther into the sky with powerful speed. Mue was hanging onto her ears as the rough wind crashed down on him. Samuel was closing his eyes and held onto her neck while Herman struggled to grab onto him.

“Danielle!”Mue screamed almost letting both of his hands slip from her ears. “Slow down!” But she didn’t reply.

“Danielle!” Herman yelled. “Slow down or we will fall!” She turned to look at them. Realizing that she should she began to slow her pace. The wind settled and everyone felt themselves relaxing as the speed died down and soon they were soaring slowly through the air. The clouds below them started to fade and the trees came into view.

Samuel gazed in wonder at all the forests and hills that stretched throughout all the land. 

“Wow,” he said and loosened his arms around Danielle’s neck. Danielle soared just above the treetops and shifted from side to side.

“Isn’t it wonderful?” Danielle asked. Samuel nodded and smiled. If only his father could see him right now.

“Should we land now?” Herman asked. “I think I’m going to be sick.” Danielle laughed and flew lower. After a moment, she landed heavily on the ground and crouched so they could climb off. Herman and Samuel turned to her.

“How did you like it Samuel?” She asked. He walked closer to her.

“Never do what you did to us again,” he replied with a bit of anger to his voice. But then he smiled a little.

“I liked it.” Danielle smiled at Samuel but he just turned and began walking away with Herman by his side.

“We’ll go hunt for some lunch,” he said. Danielle watched them vanish into the trees. That was the only moment they seemed to get along. For some reason, she felt good.

Danielle tore apart her meat and stuffed it in her mouth forcing it down her through hungrily. She was extremely hungry, especially from the flight. Mue sat against her side holding and admiring an acorn in his small hands. They sat there musing in the sun, waiting for Herman and Samuel to return from their hunt.
***

Danielle finished her two deer a while later and stood up with a baffled expression. It was over an hour since her companions had left. They should have been back by now. She looked at Mue seeing her had fallen asleep with the acorn cuddled in his arms.

"Samuel!" She called as loud as she could.

"Herman!" There was no reply.

"Where could they be? We need to get going," she muttered. However Samuel and Herman came out of the trees holding a deer.

"Why yell?" Samuel asked eyeing her and dropped the deer on the ground near them. Herman knelt down and started skinning one of the deer.

"You guys took so long I thought you weren't coming back," Danielle replied.

"We just got caught up in our hunt so it took us longer. Anyway, of course we will come back for you. We can't leave a Princess Of Zilda out here on her own." Danielle watched Samuel skin his deer. Did he really mean that? She thought. Surely we get on each others nerves but does he care about what happens to me?

"What?" Samuel asked seeing that she was watching him.

"Oh nothing," she answered and turned away. She went over to Mue and nudged him slightly with her muzzle.

"Mue, Wake up," she spoke softly. Mue turned over on his back and groaned. Then his tiny eyelids fluttered open. He gazed up at her with sleepy eyes.

"What is it?" he asked.

"You should wake up now," she stated. Mue stood on all fours and looked at Herman and Samuel. They had built a fire and were cooking meat over the flames.

"Alright," he said.

Comments & reviews · 5
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User avatar
Deanie
Review
Deanie wrote a review · Sun Sep 29, 2013 1:44 pm

Hey Sarah,

Deanie here again! I liked this chapter, a lot more than the previous ones. I will say it has greatly improved on the detail front! Especially during the battle scenes. I also find the relationship between Samuel and Danielle interesting. If I didn't know better I would think they would become a couple and Ella and Cyrnic one as well. Hmm...

There were a few spelling mistakes in this again. My advice for solving that is to read through your work once at the very least before posting it on YWS, so then the simple mistakes which you can correct yourself are already solved.

"flying upper into the sky" I think you mean flying higher.

“How did that squirrel learn to speak anyway?” he asked bitterly.

Yes, I just loved that line. It was sarcastic and definitely my favourite. As well as a pretty good question.

One thing to watch out for with this, is making sure you don't introduce too many characters by name. Already I'm wondering who is Judas, and why is he such an important character? As well as who is Herman exactly? Did Samuel just befriend a random person he met? I understand he is important to the story concerning Danielle's group. But I don't know anything other than this about him as a reader. I feel like that needs to be better explained.

Another aspect of writing which can be used greatly to your advantage is chapter endings. I don't mean every chapter has to end with suspense or a cliffhanger. Sometimes it's good to end a chapter with a final sentence, that just shines finality or summarises the theme or important message for the chapter. I'm not saying your chapter endings are bad, but just that this is a tool you might want to think about and use to your advantage. :)

I will continue reading!
Deanie x

User avatar
TinkerTwaggy
Review

Finally I find a Fantasy story^_^

And a good one on top of that I tell you!
As a dragon, Danielle has now much more personality than in her human self, I think I even prefer her in her current state, but that maybe because I'm both a reptile and dragon lover :D

I also like your narration. Smooth and well done, it allows the reader to really imagine what the characters are like, and that is an important aspect. You also show that way how the relationship between the characters evolve, and that's quite good :)
In contrast, some little grammar and spelling mistakes sometimes make the reading a bit less enjoyable, but we soon forget about them while enjoying the story and some awesome scenes, such as the battle between Daniel and the Rust dragon.

This Fantasy Story has lots of good points: well thought, well structured, and intresting to read. The way you jump off from character to character, from mind to mind is also pretty good (not really new, but the way you do it is certainly unique), we clearly see that you now master this litterary technique.


Negatively speaking I think the only real issues are your english grammar (it's always the writter's worse enemy, isn't it?), such as the use of commas, missing letters, etc. YOu'll certainyl find them all by re-reading yourself more or eventually use a spell checker (I too had that advice, let's both follow it ;) ).


Overall, well... I enjoy Fantasy, and your story seem enjoyable enough to me, I'm glad the review day made me discovered it. Keep up writting and you'll get better ! I can't wait for the next part.


Cheers!
~Shell Master Tortwag~

User avatar
KittyCatMeow
Review

Wonderful like the prologue and chapters 1 and 2! I love how Danielle sped up so much that they nearly fell off. What would've been nice is that they DID fall off and Danielle caught them. That would've brought suspense to the reader.

Samuel," the voice called. Herman and Samuel started blankly at the dragon in bewilderment.

"It's me, Danielle."

Samuel squinted in confusion. Danielle? Ella's annoying younger sister? How could this be? He stared at her in disbelief.

"Don't you remember me? It'm Danielle," the dragon continued. Herman glared at Samuel.

"What's going on?" He questioned. Samuel just looked into her eyes. Sweat dripped down his face as thoughts ran through his mind. Danielle?

"It's really me," the dragon concluded. It was her voice and those green eyes perfectly matched Danielle's. Samuel lowered his sword in defeat. He was this close to slaying his first dragon but it turned out to be the lost princess.

"Oh it's you," he said bluntly. Danielle felt like squishing the prince in her claws right then and now for talking like that.


I don't see why this dragon can talk. I know that Danielle is a princess so it's only a bit logical, but shouldn't she just roar like a dragon? A possibility could have been that Samuel slipped on a rock, and that made it possible to Danielle to escape, releasing the worry in the kingdom when Samuel came back.

"I told you the prophecy doesn't mean anything. Besides, Mystra is trapped away some where so the prophecy cannot come to pass. Without Mystra, no prophecy." Andorra opened her chamber doors and was about to walk out before the voice stopped her.


Then there's the prophecy. It should be quickly explained because the reader doesn't know what is in the prophecy. Who is in it? What is the prophecy supposed to mean? Why "Without Mystra, no prophecy?" Who is Mystra. This is hopefully all explained in the next chapters. The suspense is killing me, and maybe a few others too.

My previous question (from my review in chapter 1-2) was answered. It was about why was the Black Dragon brought back from the dead. However, I cannot see why Danielle wants to do everything with humans. Since she was a Black Dragon now, wouldn't it endanger Herman and Samuel? I mean, with all the wild things Black Dragons have to do to survive. In fact, why is Herman traveling with them? Mue is still a small squirrel, so it's easy to blend in with Danielle, but bringing humans in into fist fights with other dragons (like the battle with that Rust Dragon. Pretty intense!). Then, isn't Samuel caring for everyone back home? They must be worried, especially Ella as we all know.

I think this could definitely be improved, but it's so far pretty good. Keep on making chapters! Amazing work, amazing work!

Thanks for your review:) Most of the questions you asked are sure to be answered in next chapters.

User avatar
Auxiira
Review
Auxiira wrote a review · Sun Jun 30, 2013 9:58 am

Hey sarahnsnow! I'm Auxii and I'll be reviewing these chapters today!
Before I start, I'll just say that I haven't read the other chapters.


I think that you have a good base idea, but that it needs quite a bit of work to make it shine properly. Your sentence structure is sometimes a bit dodgy, and repetetive.

Here are a few things I picked up that really made me twitch, but there were other things too:

Flames diffused the forest floor everywhere,
You can't say this. The verb that you've used isn't applicable to fire. you can say:
Flames crept/spread/flooded the forest floor, devouring ....

which already sounds a lot better.

it's- you have big problems with this, and I did too, when I started off. Think of it this way:
-"it's" is a contraction of "it is", so if, when you write "it's", you can't break it down into "it is", then it's wrong.
-"its" is the possessive word. I know that it's really tempting to put in a possessive apostrophe, but don't do it, it isn't good.
(Fiou, that was a lot of it's!)

fire winded it's way

Winded isn't a word... actually, it is, but not for what you want it to say. Winded is when you can't take a breath, for instance if someone has punched you in the stomach.
What you want to say is:
fire wound its way


"Black Dragon?" Samuel nodded.

You repeat "Samuel nodded" again two lines down. There are other ways of showing consentment.

(My great, great, great and so on grandfather.)
Don't put things in brackets. Normally, if it's in brackets, then it can be made into a new sentence.

But Danielle wasn't about to let her food be taken by this other dragon.
This is what the French call "bofbof". A little kid would say this. You're a writer. Try and find a more interesting way of showing that she won't let he food be taken.

Show not tell. This is something that you will probably hear quite often.
For instance:
Just by his face, they knew something was wrong.

You can change this to:
"Panic painted his face. Something was wrong."
I find that this has a lot more impact and shows the problem.

maybe put thoughts in italics.


I think that you need to read through again and do a good edit, look at your sentence structure and all of the points above!

Hope I helped and keep writing!
Auxiira^^

Thanks so much for your review! You pointed out a lot of things for me. I will certainly fix it in the future.

User avatar
Griffinkeeper
Review

This story is in serious need of editing. Unfortunately, I'm running low on time, but I can give you an understanding of what I mean by just taking care of the first paragraph.

Flames diffused the forest floor everywhere, devouring trees, bushes and everything in it's path like an angry beast. Fire winded it's way up trees burning them to crisp. Soot rose into the air refraining the sunlight from shining through. The cry of an immense dragon came from above filling Samuel's ears as he struggled to make his way through the thickening smoke.


You are complicating your writing by using more complicated words where a simpler one would do. For instance "diffused" instead of "spread." The result of this is that you are using the more complicated words improperly. This becomes glaringly obvious when you replace the complicated word with the simpler word, as I shall now demonstrate.

"Flames spread the forest floor everywhere..."


Adding the word "along" between "diffused" and "the forest floor" would properly convey your idea, but I think you would be better off if you changed "diffused" to "spread" instead. You're less likely to misuse a word when you are familiar with it.

Another example:

Soot rose into the air refraining the sunlight from shining through.


The word "refrain" is used to demonstrate self-restraint against an impulse and is frequently followed by the word "from." You refrain from using drugs and alcohol. You refrain from killing your annoying siblings. You refrain from cursing in front of your parents.

But soot, air, and sunlight do not have impulses to speak of. A better word is needed.

The soot blocked the sunlight.


Notice the efficiency of this sentence. I communicated the same idea that you did, with a third of the words and none of the confusion.

And at the end of three sentences, you still haven't really captured the horror that a forest fire really is.

The first thing about a forest fire is the sheer heat of it. It isn't even from being on fire either, it can come simply from the light of the fire. In the same way that we feel warm in the sunlight, you will feel warm from the light of a fire. Only in the case of a forest fire, it is a wall of flame, not a cute little campfire.

The second thing about a forest fire is the noise. The heat of the fire causes air to rise quickly, creating a whooshing sound. Moisture inside of trees is super heated, and then explodes with a loud popping noise. Trees that are burnt out, become too weak to stand, and they fall down, making a loud crashing noises. Not to mention the sound of every woodland creature running for their lives.

The third thing is the smoke. You only covered this a little. Because smoke doesn't completely blacken the sky, at least not at first. What it does is it makes the sky red. Everything takes on a hellish hue. The smoke is overwhelming and it will choke you. If you are too close to the fire, you can die from smoke inhalation. Smoke isn't the only thing in the air either. There are embers from the fire flying around, like little fireflies. There is ash from the fire, which comes down like snow.

You are using the forest fire as scenery, but there is a big difference between scenery and setting. Scenery is something you look at; a setting is something the character interacts with. And right now, the character is only partially interacting with it.

Time to wrap things up:

1. You're trying to be too complicated in your word choices, which is leading to your misusing the words: simpler words will reduce this.

2. You're sentences should be trimmed so that clarity is the first priority. You can probably cut your word count by a third, without sacrificing detail.

3. Rather than trying to use elaborate words to describe things, try varying the aspects you are describing. You described what the character is seeing, but descriptions of other aspects, like smell, touch, and hearing, can really add an extra dimension to the story.

Overall, you've got a good first draft. Applying these principles to the draft will make it shorter and give it more power than it currently has.



"Do not try to be pretty. You weren't meant to be pretty; you were meant to burn down the earth and graffiti the sky. Don't let anyone ever simplify you to just 'pretty'"
— Suzanne Rivard