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140,235 Literary Works • 673,048 Reviews
I really liked this poem, and how short and snappy the lines were. The development of the story in the poem was nicely done as well, following the person as they go through the reasons being with them is complicated and ending with that unexplainable reason that they still love them simply 'because'. My favorite lines were " grow and live,/learn and love./Still they say /dumb and in lust./ I disregard"
I only saw a few mistakes. In the 6th line it doesn't really make sense. I think it was probablly just a typo. I think possiblly the line "but my daddy hates you" might be better broken in half because it seems a little long. The rest of the flow of the poem I thought was good. Last suggestion is that in the secound to last line "i" should be capitalized.
Thanks for posting, it was an enjoyable read. Have a great day!
~Alliyah