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Reclaimed from the Sea's Embrace

by ariah347

In a sea so vast, a boat once did roam,
On it, a lost wanderer, all alone.
A heart adrift without any map,
Too big a journey than she was apt.

Through crowded skies and empty ocean,
She searched for meaning in the motion.
But in the tumult, she felt estranged,
As if her soul were forever changed.

The stars above whispered a silent plea,
"Keep searching, dear one, you'll find your key."
And in the depths of her weary soul,
She held onto hope to make herself whole.

Then, one fateful day, their paths did meet,
A stranger's eyes so kind and sweet.
In those gentle orbs, a world be told,
A universe of love, a home to hold.

With every word and every smile,
She felt a warmth that eased the trial.
In this special soul, she found her reflection,
A bond so deep, beyond detection.

Like two puzzle pieces finally aligned,
Their souls entwined, their hearts combined.
No longer adrift, no longer astray,
With him, her love, she found her way.

He is the moon to her sunlit sky,
In his embrace, she soared so high.
With him, she found a place to belong,
In the rhythm of their hearts' sweet song.

Together they danced, hand in hand,
Creating magic in this wonderland.
In the embrace of his loving arms,
She found solace, safe from harm.

No longer lost in the sea's embrace,
With him, her love, she found her place.
He is her home, her heart's true shore,
In his love, she found forevermore.

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Points: 200
Reviews: 0

Wed Sep 20, 2023 3:26 pm
JPB1956UK says...

I adore this.

I read it out loud, the first time, and later to a few friends online.

I found that on reading it aloud there was much value in breaking cadence at certain points, both to allow for breath and to enhance dramatic moments in keeping with the punctuation.

ariah347 says...

TY! I don't usually read what I write aloud, but this makes me want to in the future! Welcome to YSW! Wishing you well :)

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Points: 438
Reviews: 4

Wed Aug 02, 2023 10:10 pm
Ki1roy wrote a review...

hi, Kilroy here,
I think the poem was good, but the pacing between the stars telling her "Keep searching, dear one, you'll find your key." and her finding the 'love of her life' was a bit off. the time between her talking to the stars and finding her love needed to be longer. also why was she alone on the ocean? what made her a lost soul? did she lose a past lover? was she a hopeless romantic?
other than that, this is a good poem, and I like the imagery you used, it made the words flow nicely.

ariah347 says...

You bring up good questions and points! I may have to revise one day!!
Thank you for the review!!

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179 Reviews

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Reviews: 179

Wed Aug 02, 2023 5:24 am
OrabellaAvenue wrote a review...

Hi! This is Orabella, here to review.

Welcome to YWS! I hope you'll like it here. We're glad to have you.

I found this a to be a very sweet poem, at least at the end. Your rhymes were well-placed, and the peacefulness calmed me a great deal. I think my favorite two lines were,

Together they danced, hand in hand,
Creating magic in this wonderland.

I don't know why, exactly. It might just be because I'm obsessed with different wonderlands currently, or maybe because it's simply amazing.

I don't know much about romance, so sorry that this isn't very extensive. But I like the metaphor where she was all alone at sea, but then she found someone. Tell me if I'm wrong about that, but I guess this is how I interpret it.

Anyways, I really liked this poem, and I hope to read more from you soon! (Sorry about the short length)

Keep writing!

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662 Reviews

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Reviews: 662

Tue Aug 01, 2023 9:25 pm
Messenger wrote a review...

hi there. First off, welcome to YWS!

This poem conjured up a lot of things for me all at once. for one, it reminded me of how Galadriel meets

Spoiler! :
in The Rings of Power. There's nothing to learn there but I thought you should know ;P

On a more serious note, it pulled my mind to a song called You by Thomas Bergersen. It has a similar yin-yang comparison that your poem has near the second half, and is also describing a lover's connection.
I also thought that the flow and rhythm were very smooth throughout. There was maybe a time or two where I re-read a line, but I had no trouble keeping a flow for the most part, and I'm not THAT musically inclined.

If I had a critique to make, it would be in the stars' encouragement to keep looking for a key. I would have liked to see that imagery come around, instead of perhaps, the puzzle pieces aligning. You also use the phrase "no longer" to start two different measures, so you could consider modifying one unless you were going for the repetition.

Overall I love the peace. I'm not a coastal person, but the sea does intrigue me (I've even written a short story about two brothers at sea) so I love the setting. It creates a sense of space and loneliness and wonder.

Hopefully this helps :)

ariah347 says...

First, I must explore The Rings of Power, as I have no idea what that is! Also, I will listen to the song you mention. Thanks for the recommendations, albeit they were not forthright recommendations lol. I love exploring new art!

I did not realize that I started two lines the same - I'll chock it up to intentional ;) As for the imagery, you'll likely find as I share more that I use the sky as inspiration hence the use of stars being the guide!

Thank you for the review!!!

Messenger says...

Rings of Power is a precursor to the Lord of the Rings and Hobbit, but I would NOT recommend it xD it has a plethora of issues. I LOVE the song though. I have it on my wife romantic playlist lol

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909 Reviews

Points: 229
Reviews: 909

Tue Aug 01, 2023 4:57 pm
vampricone6783 wrote a review...

After a long and perilous journey, she found what her heart deserved. She may not have known then, but she knew when it really, truly mattered. However hard something may be, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. This was quite the touching poem. It seemed like she wouldn’t find happiness at all, with the odds, and yet, she did.

I hope that you will have a beautiful day/night.

ariah347 says...

thank you :) :) :)

"If I see an American in real life or a kiwi in a blockbuster, it feels surreal and weird, and like a funny trip."
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