Young Writers Society

Hi-o, always nice to see a good poem.

The heart is compared to a computer and a train engine. These two separate metaphors intermixed on top of each other add confusion on how the heart is "roboticized." I like this confusion because it adds to 'brokenness' of the heart. It isn't a perfect machine that is optimized. It is jury-rigged together. Parts of different machines and parts of a heart: a cyborg heart.

The use of heart emojis as paragraph breaks is really smart. I want to do something like that now.

Good Job!

Hi babes, izzy here

I related to this one a lot, not int he moment but fifteen year old heartbroken me did.

I loved how in the beginning it's explaining the vital functions of a heart and what it does for the need to survive.
Your heart has two defintions; a vital organ needed to survive, and your emotional bandwidth.
You slowly showed how the hearts emotional meaning had changed causing your brain to think differently. Your heart is cracked but no surgeon could ever fix that.
Being in a state of depression or even just sadness after heart ache is terrifying. It's terrifying because of the fear of being stuck here. Slowly that fear turns to longing to stay in this heart broken spot. You don't want to be happy because this is who you are now. I believe with the right tools this kind of hearts malfunction can be saved and healed.
You talk about it, you cope.
My favorite line was defintely " In numbness and rust, it's safer here"
The last line kind of hit deep with me. The world I was living in, in my sad cold bare room was safer than the world out there. I struggled with school keeping relationships all because of this. A heart's ache is hard to heal.

I really liked ur poem but i have one question haha, are you okay